When you write about a past event that has blocked you, you release the blockage and let life flow more freely. Honesty, however, is paramount in journal writing. You cannot hide yourself behind your own words.

You Can Be Yourself in Your Journal

A journal is the only place where you’re totally, absolutely and completely free to be yourself. It is the perfect refuge for the many irritations, conflicts, disappointments and stresses life throws at you. It allows you to ramble with no sense of direction, to indulge in cliches, to be irrational, and to lament.

“The most important thing,” says Eldonna Edwards Bouton, author of Loose Ends: A Journaling Tool for Tying Up the Incomplete Details of Your Life and Heart, “is not to judge yourself or let any other critics, real or imagined, into the room when you write. If you’re intimidated by a blank page, begin by asking yourself: ‘What do I need?’ or ‘How do I feel about ______?’ Use ‘I feel’ instead of ‘I think,’ when you write, so the inner knowledge comes from your heart instead of your head.”

Bouton adds, “When you release your stories on page [or, a screen], you make room for new truths. The page listens without judgement. At times, your journal may be the best friend you have. Write as if no one will ever read your words, but you. Within the safety of your pages, you face your demons and, suddenly, they lose their power over you. Don’t hold on to them, either. Turn the page. Forgive. Move on.”

The Healing Benefits of Journaling

The benefits of journaling are many:

1. It helps release and review your emotions

Journaling provides a safe space to express and process emotions. It allows you to explore and understand your thoughts, feelings, and experiences, helping to promote emotional well-being and self-awareness.

2. Lowers stress

As science as shown, journaling helps lower stress levels. Writing down your thoughts and feelings allows you to offload your worries, anxieties, and frustrations onto the page, helping to alleviate emotional tension and promote a sense of calm.

3. Brings clarity

Writing down your thoughts can help “unjumble” them, bringing clarity and perspective on situations. When your journal about the problems you are facing, it can lead to new insights and solutions that you probably never occurred to you.

4. Self-reflection and personal growth

Journaling is, by its very nature, an activity of self-reflection and self-discovery. Writing down your thoughts regularly enables you to track your progress, set goals, and identify patterns or areas for personal growth and improvement. It also assists in creating an action plan to improve the quality of your life, and [re]discover your dreams, goals and strengths.

Science Shows the Journaling Promotes Healing and Wellbeing

Researchers have found that people who write about their deepest thoughts and feelings surrounding upsetting events tend to have stronger immunity and visit their doctors half as often as those who only write about trivial events. Holding on to feelings of anger and grief stops you from experiencing life to the fullest. Sometimes, writing a letter to someone who has hurt you is the closest you can get to closure. It is a way of letting go of the past, so you can begin to live in the present.

A study published in the British Journal of Health Psychology examined the effects of expressive writing on individuals with PTSD. The researhers, J M Smyth and J W Pennebaker found that participants who spent time expressing themselves in words experienced reduced PTSD symptoms and improved psychological wellbeing compared to those in the control group.

Another study titled Journaling about stressful events: Effects of cognitive processing and emotional expression, published in the Annals of Behavioral Medicine, studied the impact of journaling on stress reduction and emotional wellbeing. It found that people who engaged in expressive writing experienced greater emotional release, reduced distress, and improved physical health outcomes.

How to Tap Into the Healing Power of Journaling

Journaling allows you to reassess life events, be it trauma or triumph. Your words cannot change the past, but they can provide a context in which you understand it better and master the lessons that lie within or without. The idea is to write about the good and the bad, so you don’t end up sounding like a miserable person with a lousy life. The secret is to find a healthy balance between the positive and the negative.

There is no right or wrong way to begin a journal. Just take a deep breath and start writing. As an initiation exercise you’d like to begin with a dedication to someone who impacted your life. Or, work with a theme: dreams, nature or people.

Write a letter to a person you have unresolved issues with. Record a slice of family history. Preserve the priceless tales of your past. Maybe, you’d like to write only for yourself. The purpose is to open up that valve of honesty and channel your innermost thoughts, feelings, desires, frustrations and dreams into your journal. Saving a journal entry, or trashing it, is entirely up to you, but the process is an invaluable release of emotion.

How and where do you start your journaling practice?

1. First, have a journal and pen in place
2. Next, get started: your first day of school, your first memory, your first crush, or your first period
3. Write with a pen that feels good in your hand and leaves you wanting to write more
4. Allow your thoughts to unfurl on paper. Think of times that work best for you. Is it the calm freshness of early morning? Or, would it be the stillness of the night and its chores put to bed? Whatever time you choose, shut the outside world and its chaos out
5. Listen to the quiet within. Meditate on paper
6. Dating each entry provides a context and helps you see how far you’ve traveled on your writing journey.

Here are a few tips to help you with your journaling experiment

• Set a regular time for journaling everyday. Promise yourself you’ll write for at least 15 minutes 3-4 times a week
• Don’t worry about spelling or grammar, right and wrong. Just write anything that comes to your mind freely
• It is okay to write about the same thing on the 3–4 days you’ve set for yourself. Or, write something new each day. The choice is yours
• If you feel uninspired, look for writing prompts online to nudge your thoughts
• Find a quiet spot, a place where you’re not likely to be interrupted, and retire there daily. Use colored ink to write on different pages. Or, color-code your entries depending on your mood
• Add patterns, or borders, to highlight, or create page divisions.

7 Journaling Prompts to Get You Started

1. Write a letter to your former self. Write with compassion. What suggestions would you make to yourself? What makes you proud of yourself and how have you changed since then?
2. Write about forgiveness. Do you have anything or anybody that you need to forgive? How has harboring anger or resentment impacted your wellbeing? What actions can you take to forgive and let go?
3. Examine the limiting ideas or self-talk that you frequently use. Put each one to the test by writing them down. Replace them with optimistic statements or realistic viewpoints.
4. Describe three positive aspects of your personality; also mention why you chose them. Celebrate your accomplishments, good traits, and talents.
5. Write about a circumstance or a relationship that you have been having trouble with. How do you feel and what are your opinions about it? How can you tackle this situation with kindness and respect for both yourself and others?
6. Describe a place or activity that brings you joy and peace. How does that activity or surrounding make you feel? How can you increase its presence in your life?
7. Write about a time in your life when you felt hurt or deceived. How has it affected you? What actions can you do to get over this hurt and earn back your trust?

This is an updated version of the article that first appeared in the February 2007 issue of Complete Wellbeing magazine.

The post How to Tap Into the Healing Power of Journaling + 7 Prompts to Get You Started appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

In the Delhi suburb where my husband Girish and I started married life, the library was a hole-in-the-wall space. When we moved to Chennai, I became a member of two libraries: Eloor, a single room that housed racks and racks of books; and, the plush British Council Library with its bright orange furniture and comfy couches.

Days after we moved to a Chicago suburb, I stepped into Schaumburg Township District Library for the first time and thought I’d stumbled into heaven. My imagination can conjure up pretty amazing stuff, but even I wasn’t prepared for anything like this: the cavernous carpeted spaces and books housed in two storeys; the adult section and the “Enchanted Forest” for tots, the music and DVD sections, ESL classrooms, computer labs and a cozy café.

Time stands still when I’m in a library; my fingers caressing the thick spines, smelling the ink and gazing at the tall shelves of books that never fail to remind me: so many books, so little time.

Books used to be my friends

It is daunting that I find no solace between the pages of a book now; something I’ve always counted on for escape. A book got me through most of life’s challenges: when Appa’s drunken binge pushed me to the fuzzy edges of sanity; when I started married life in a city without a single friend to call my own; when I missed my siblings; as a new mom doing the diaper marathon; and sitting outside the intensive care unit waiting for a white-coated doctor to show up with an update on Appa.

No book holds my attention now. When you’ve stared death in the face, trite characters and plots seem trivial. Akin to an alcoholic who gags at the sight of the amber liquid he once thirsted for.

Questions buzz non-stop in my head: Why me? Why her? Why now? Where did she go? Images recur, like a screensaver. One particular image edges the rest out, occupies centre stage: Amma’s lifeless body in a turmeric-yellow silk sari, its breath silenced. The image is accompanied by a single thought that plays over and over, a record needle stuck in its groove.

We come into this world with nothing; we leave with nothing.

Amma worked hard her whole life, but left with nothing except the one garment she was wearing.

This truth fills me with despair and dread. And if this is the truth, my entire life has been a lie. It mocks all that I’ve ever believed in: success, ambition, material comforts, basically a life of fulfilment. None of it makes any sense. I feel a void.

Trying to fit the pieces

You come into the world an innocent infant full of potential and possibility; you grow up and get an education; you get the right degrees; you get a job; you get married; have kids; they grow up and have kids; and if you’re lucky, you get to bounce your grandkids on your knee before you die an average unglorified death. Is this all there is?

Something tells me this script is incomplete; that I’m missing a vital link here.

And again, the single tormenting image. Amma’s body draped in a yellow sari, the only earthly possession she took with her—that too, only as far as the crematorium.

Where do the pieces fit, I begin to wonder. The struggle to find the perfect job, the one that makes you feel like a million bucks even if it doesn’t bring home anything close? The rented apartment which mocks you, so you obsess about finding ways to increase your real estate footprint? The scooter, the car, then the bigger car, the fancier car… and on and on, this relentless quest for ‘stuff’ we never get to take, anyway.

The answers begin to pop out

I wander around the library for hours, the questions growing louder inside my head—just so I don’t have to stay home alone and wrestle with them.

Just as I turn to head out, I come to a dead halt in the non-fiction aisle. A book screams out loud at me. A book I’ve glimpsed many times in the past, and know to be an Oprah’s Book Club selection—A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose by Eckhart Tolle. I don’t quite understand the urgency, but I lunge and grab it like it’s the last copy on the planet.

When I get home, and start to read, I cannot put it down. It has me hooked like a spy thriller, only it’s chock-full of philosophy that’s all new to me. Tolle refers to the ego as the false self, and illumines the need to awaken to a new consciousness from the place of one’s true self. I drink deep, waking from a long, dry thirst, as if this is the book I’ve been waiting for, the answer to life’s recent anguish.

When you die, the book proclaims, you will be judged on the basis of your true self, and how well you lived your life according to its tenets. Amma’s life flashes before my eyes. A+ all the way, I think to myself. She scores big because she had no desire to be right, to win the arguments, to walk over others. For most of my life, I had a word for it: doormat. I watched how she never let petty quarrels upset her rhythm, was rarely offended, and hardly ever blamed anyone, no matter what was going on in her life. What I’d always seen as weakness I now begin to know is strength.

My quest to understand death

Over the weeks, books on death and dying and the afterlife begin to fascinate me. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross’ On Life After Death explains that Amma shed her cocoon [physical body] and became a butterfly in death. I love the image of Amma as a colourful butterfly, flitting about sunlit gardens, drinking deeply to fill her soul, free and untethered in a way her earthly life could never be.

One evening, I pick up a copy of Sogyal Rinpoche’s The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying and flip through the pages. A friend handed me the book before I left Chennai. I skip to part two: Dying. The first words in the section speak to me: “In a hospice I know, Emily, a woman in her late sixties, was dying of breast cancer. Her daughter would visit her everyday and there seemed to be a happy relationship between the two. But when her daughter had left, Emily would nearly always sit alone and cry. After a while, it became clear that the reason for this was that her daughter had refused completely to accept the inevitability of her death…”

The words shock me in the solar plexus. It sounds so familiar to Amma’s story, and mine. A voracious appetite stoked, I read further.

Every page I turn, key concepts jump out at me: compassion, forgiveness, preparing to die, and dying well. Concepts I’ve never considered, being too busy living life. The words make me feel petty and childish. I consider the futility of the energy we invest in hanging onto grudges and offences, real and imagined. The truth: it all evaporates the instant our breath leaves the body.

The sense of urgency I experience is so powerful I stride to my desk, flip open my laptop and make a list of names. They are the people I’ve wronged and need to make amends with: a dear friend with whom I fell out over a silly argument; a business contact whose actions I’d silently questioned and blamed; a friend whose life I’d disappeared from. Dredging up incidents and names from the hidden recesses of my mind is strangely liberating.

Over the next half an hour, I compose emails to each of them, rendering an apology, resolving a conflict, taking ownership, letting go. When I’m done, my moral slate wiped clean for now, I feel a sense of deep peace in the centre of my being. So much better than the bitter acid that churned in my gut making me hold on, grasp, want to be right.

These books are my first encounters with a sliver of peace, a feeling that just maybe, there is meaning to this madness we call the earthly journey. Buried beneath the chaos and ruins of my tragic situation are treasures that I’m slowly waking up to.

The post Losing my mom and the journey to find myself appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

Once upon a time in my childhood

If I were to describe my life in a single word, I’d choose the word story. My paternal grandma deserves the rich honour of opening the doors to the realm of imagination and creativity. As I think back to memories of childhood, she is the one who steals the spotlight. I sat besides her on sweltering summer afternoons, feeling the soft wrinkled folds of skin on her arm as I traveled to Lanka and Mithila, Dwaraka and Hastinapura. I flew the blue skies with Hanuman as he brought home the life-restoring herb from Sanjivini to revive a wounded Lakshmana when he fought the demon king, Ravana. I tasted every fruit that Shabari lovingly plucked and bit into in keen anticipation of Lord Rama’s visit.

It was Grandma who fostered in me a deep and abiding love of story—the art of storytelling, story writing and trading people’s stories with mine.

Story shapes our life.
Story gives meaning to our journey.
Story is the container for our destiny.

The wise old art of storytelling

To my pleasant surprise, it was storytelling that saved me as I applied for jobs in a new country, wondering if I’d have to settle for a humdrum desk job doing something just for a paycheck. A part-time position in a senior living community allowed me the bandwidth to create a space for seniors to share their life stories. For sixty minutes every week, a group of octogenarians and nonagenarians take centre stage in my group. As they tell stories of lives lived a long time ago, their faces light up and their eyes shine.

We live in a world where the elderly feel invisible a lot of the time. In our talk-text-and-message world of quick communication, their rambling narratives and measured pace, minuscule attention spans and confused memories have no place.

They find in this space a firm footing, as stories stored in long-term memories unfold, one sentence, one situation, one scene at a time. Stories of growing up dirt-poor during the Depression era; of crouching with pounding hearts in makeshift bomb shelters; of sending their men to war and committing to the war effort themselves; of evenings spent listening to the radio; of after-dinner dessert being nothing more ambitious than a dish of berries or peaches; of their moms labouring to get the perfect Shirley Temple curls, the rage of the time.

These are stories that remain evergreen in their minds—even as they struggle to remember whether they took their post-lunch pill or transferred the wet wash to the dryer.

Something delightful happens in the room when someone forgets a minor detail of the past. When Janice has trouble recalling the brand of butter that most families used back in the day, Virginia helps her out. That starts a discussion on butter churns, which leads to how they washed clothes using an old-fashioned wringer and the smell of sunshine on sheets. Each one helps connect the dots and feel connected to a world they all inhabited, which helps them connect to each other. These connections travel well beyond story time in the group.

For someone like me, a stranger to their culture and their world, it has been like living and breathing history. Now I know concentration camp and World war survivors; I know men who fought in these wars; I know women who raised police officers and fire-fighters. As 12 to 15 people become inspiring, heroic characters in their retellings, I watch history come alive.

It is a rich emotional experience, this sharing of stories. As they tell me tales of jukeboxes and ice cream fountains, I share stories of growing up in India, of customs and rituals that shaped my life, of rural and urban life that harmonise the reality of the haves and have-nots.

How sharing tales help?

This time of shared life stories has multiple benefits that go far beyond the pleasure of community and connection.

Transmit life lessons to the younger generations

80 plus years of living brings with it rich life lessons. Although the world of these seniors was significantly different from the one we inhabit, the themes and threads that run through life are always the same: the desire for happiness, a meaningful vocation, more connected relationships and less stress. Having travelled the path, elders have much wisdom to share on how to navigate life’s rocky terrain.

Mental health benefits

Storytelling is known to improve memory function in seniors. Recall, narration and connecting the dots strengthen areas of the brain which may otherwise atrophy. Added to this is the benefit of emotional nurturing as seniors feel a sense of belonging, coming from a world of challenges and pleasures they all shared.

Social and emotional connections

When seniors move into the community, they often feel displaced from homes and neighbourhoods they have known and loved. My group is a safe way for them to ease the loneliness of the transition as they find and form new friendships with others who are in similar shoes.

Connection to a common world

At a time when they can barely remember where they placed their walker or how to get to a certain room to attend a programme, sharing stories of a world they remember helps them feel rooted. It was a time when they had real roles in life as mothers, wives, teachers and nurses and it strengthens them to be reminded of a purposeful existence.

The opportunity for a life review

In reviewing their lives from today’s perspective, many have had the opportunity to understand mistakes made and choices that led them down roads they may not have chosen to travel. It is a fresh opportunity to revisit some unpleasant stories and give them pleasant endings. Beginnings and endings define the chapter of life. As we sit around a table and tell stories, we have the opportunity to create new beginnings and better endings.

Growing old can be awfully lonely. Storytelling helps seniors know that their life matters and gives you time to spend with your loved ones. These last days will not come again. So by reliving old tales and memories, you can make sure that the seniors don’t waste them by worrying.

The post The wise old art of story telling appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

“Suffering is simply the difference between what is and what I want it to be.”
— Dr Spencer Johnson

If you’re human, you’ve known loss.

Where there is life, there is loss.

And loss is a word that contains much more than the death of someone we love and lose.

It is the grief we experience as we watch a beloved parent disappear into the shadows as dementia eats away at their sense of self.

It is the death of a marriage that once held the hope and promise of lasting happiness.

It is the severing of a friendship when betrayal and hurt tear apart the tenderness of a cherished connection.

It is the alienation of a geographical move, far away from everything and everyone familiar and known.

It is our children growing wings and leaving home to soar in the big, blue skies of freedom.

Loss walks alongside us on this earthly journey—because every life transition involves a measure of loss. How we deal with our losses determines how we live our lives. Some of us shut down and barricade our hearts, afraid and anxious of being hurt again. Others are broken open by loss and, as a result, go on to live more expansive lives.

Every loss has something to teach us—if we care to listen. Here are three lessons that come to us through the experience of loss in our lives.

We are not alone

Our first response to loss is usually Why me? It is normal to feel alone and believe that our life is doomed. We feel an intense sense of alienation, because we notice the world continues to move on, whereas life as we have known it has come to a complete standstill. But when we pause, take a breath and connect with the larger truth, this is what we know: Everything that is born must die.

Pain is part of the human experience and no one gets a free pass. This very realisation connects us to the truth that we are not alone in our experience of grief. Everyone’s life has its own form of pain—whether it’s a divorce, a terminal illness, family feuds, teenagers making poor choices or addictions that topple entire families. Singer Jana Stanfield’s lyrics “You hurt just like me, I cry just like you” bring home this powerful truth. So, no matter who you are and no matter the nature of your pain, stop and close your eyes for a moment. Connect with millions of others all over the world who are walking in similar shoes—and you will feel a little less alone.

Focus on what matters to you

Anytime we suffer a loss, life has a way of narrowing the lens. We have the opportunity to reflect on what truly matters—and let the other stuff go. When my mother died in 2009, a powerful truth dawned on me—I don’t have all the time in the world. It jolted me to the urgency of living my life on purpose, investing my time and energies in what fuelled my passions. I could no longer take my time here for granted. Living in alignment with that principle, I focus on my top passions: writing, teaching, coaching and learning. I have little time for gossip, complaining, or indulging in activities that drain my energy. Our soul is here to deliver its gifts, talents and treasures, and living purposefully is about being mindful of our soul’s agenda. Australian author Bronnie Ware draws our attention to this in her best-selling book The Top Five Regrets of the Dying. She says that the number one regret of the dying is: “I wish I’d lived a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” When a crisis awakens us, it offers us a second chance to evaluate our priorities.

Heal another’s broken heart and you heal yours

When we are steeped in the sorrow of our loss, we buy into the notion that God or the Universe is unfair, unfathomable and punishing. But if we take the energy of our pain and turn it into purpose by serving another, the very act of being a healing touch in another’s life mends what’s broken in us.

For me, visiting nursing homes to console and comfort the elderly who ached for companionship was the most healing act of self-care in the midst of mourning my mother. Service helped heal my broken heart in ways that I simply cannot articulate. It is my belief that the Divine energy of reaching out in love was returned to me a thousandfold. Spiritual teacher Neale Donald Walsh, best-selling author of the Conversations with God series, says, “Your life is not about you. It is about everybody whose lives you touch.”

Loss is life’s biggest and best teacher. The only question is: Am I a willing learner?

This was first published in the April 2016 issue of Complete Wellbeing.

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Perspiration that is triggered by intense feelings occurs on the face, palms, underarms and the soles of your feet. Your moods, certain foods and beverages, hormones and medication can all affect the way you smell.

For many of us, sweating is simply bothersome. The odour that occurs with it is sheer embarrassment. Although perspiration doesn’t have an odour, it smells when it comes in contact with the bacteria on your skin.

Types of sweat glands

There are two types of sweat glands on your skin: eccrine glands and apocrine glands. Eccrine sweat glands that number between 2-5 million are present over most of your body and open directly on the surface of your skin. As they secrete perspiration onto the surface of your skin, your body temperature cools down as the sweat evaporates.

Apocrine glands secrete a fatty sweat directly into the tubule of the gland. When a person experiences stress, the wall of the tube contracts and the sweat is pushed directly onto the surface of the skin when bacteria begin breaking it down. This is what causes the strong odour.

Causes of sweating

• Heredity. Some people sweat more on their palms and soles of their feet, which is an inherited problem.
• Hormonal imbalances. During menopause, women experience hot flashes which cause a rise in body temperature, which in turn produces excessive sweating. This is due to a drop in oestrogen levels.
• Beverages. Intake of coffee and alcohol tends to cause more sweating.
• Spicy food. Heavily spiced foods also increase body heat and cause sweating.
• Drugs. Certain medications such as analgesics and overdose of thyroid medication also produce more sweat.
• Low sugar. When the body’s sugar levels drop, sweating occurs. Diabetics recognise this as a warning and take action by eating or drinking.

Smell good by eliminating body odour

• Use deodorants or anti-perspirants regularly after a shower. Deodorants eliminate odour [but do not stop perspiration], turn your skin acidic and make it less attractive to bacteria.
• Shower twice a day, especially as we live in a hot and polluted country.
• Change your socks often, wash and dry your feet.
• If you have trouble with sweaty feet, rotate your shoes. Try not to wear the same pair two days in a row.
• Cover your head when taking a walk at noon.
• Wear cotton socks as they absorb moisture better.
• Dry your feet thoroughly after showering and powder between your toes.
• Wear natural fabrics such as linen and cotton that help your skin to breathe.
• Watch your diet. Make sure it is low on alcoholic beverages and spicy foods.
• Try relaxation techniques such as yoga and meditation to help reduce stress levels.

Smell good by banishing bad breath

The problem of bad breath, called halitosis, also leaves a bad taste in the mouth. A dry mouth or thick saliva on a regular basis is a problem sufferers live with. If your breath is causing people to step away from you, if you’re in the habit of chewing gum, using breath fresheners or popping mints, if your breath is interfering with your social or professional success in some way, you suffer from halitosis.

Chronic halitosis is a condition in which a person produces an offensive odour from their oral or nasal regions. This is different from the “morning breath” many of us wake-up with. The unfortunate fact is most halitosis sufferers are unaware of their breath problem until they are informed about it.

Some of the common causes of halitosis are sinus infections and abnormal sinuses, tonsil infections, kidney, lung or liver diseases, diabetes, gallbladder dysfunction, allergy conditions, post-nasal discharge, gum disease, dental decay, menstruation and blood disorders. Food particles trapped in the mouth are also breeding grounds for bacteria that cause bad breath. When the mouth is dry, saliva production decreases and the mouth’s natural ability to cleanse itself is impaired.

Exhale easy

• Brush your teeth and rinse your mouth thoroughly after every meal.
• Brush your tongue also, for it is covered with tiny hairs that trap bacteria.
• See your dentist regularly to ensure oral hygiene.
• Chew sugarless gum or suck on sugarless lozenges to increase the flow of saliva, your mouth’s natural mouthwash.
• Drink plenty of water. Hold it in your mouth for about 20 seconds and swoosh it around to dislodge any stubborn food particles that the bacteria in your mouth are waiting for.
• Avoid mints and mouthwashes that contain alcohol. They worsen a bad breath condition by temporarily covering the smell. But they eventually dry the mouth and provide a fertile breeding ground for bacteria.
• Eating fresh fruit and veggies like celery and carrot help cleanse the mouth.
• If you have an important meeting, avoid strong-smelling foods like garlic and onion.
• Avoid caffeine and alcohol – both dry the mouth.
• Quit smoking. Tar and nicotine build up on the surface of the teeth and tongue and also inhibit saliva flow.
• Apply a few drops of peppermint or tea tree oil to the tongue to freshen your breath. Their anti-bacterial properties will also kill the odour-causing bacteria in your mouth.

So follow these simple tips and ensure that you smell good all the time!

The post Ways to smell good appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

Nails and health

Taking good care of your nails and maintaining their cleanliness is very important. Did you know that your fingernails carry bacteria and germs beneath them? If nails are not neatly trimmed or filed, it is an opportunity for dirt and bacteria to get trapped in them. Bacteria are passed from person to person through nails and result in spread of infection and illness. Similarly, when you bite your nails where dirt is lodged, it is an easy entry into your body for the germs which then cause nasty illnesses. That is why a good nail care regimen is a must.

The importance of a proper balanced diet cannot be emphasised enough if you care about the quality of your nails. Calcium and iron deficiency may cause irregular nail growth. The other important aspect is a regular massage. Blood flow around the nail bed brings nutrients that allow healthy nails to grow. Massaging with a hand lotion is an excellent way to stimulate blood flow into the nail bed. If your nails seem crumbly and whitish or yellowish, and look slightly separated from the nail bed,it could be a fungal infection. In such as case, consult your doctor. If you have loose skin down the side of the nail, trim it off with sharp scissors to reduce the risk of skin tearing or infections getting into the skin.

Basic nail care

• Wash hands with a mild soap, using a nailbrush
• Immerse hands in warm water for a few minutes to soak the cuticles
• Push back the cuticles very gently if they look ragged
• Trim all nails to the same length
• File the ends to smoothen them off
• If you have dry hands, apply some hand cream.

A weekly nail care programme

You can do a self-manicure once a week. Here is how:

• First, remove all traces of old nail polish, if any. Moisten a cotton ball with nail polish remover and press over the nail for a few seconds to soften the polish. Firmly move the cotton from the base of the nail to the tip. Repeat until all nail polish is wiped off.
• Shape the nail using an emery board. File from corner to centre. Filing in a “see-saw” motion will cause your nails to split.
• Clean your fingers/nails. Soak hands in warm, soapy water for a few minutes to loosen the dirt. Use a toothbrush to gently scrub away stubborn dirt lodged under your nails.
• Push back the cuticles. This is the skin that grows from the finger to the base of the nail.
• Make sure nails are clean and dry, free of any oil or lotion before you apply polish.
• Apply clear nail polish. This acts like a base coat. Allow the polish to dry completely or at least for a minute before you continue. It helps the polish stay longer.
• Apply nail polish if you wish. In applying polish, you should be able to cover the nail in three strokes, one on each side and one in the middle. It is always advisable to wait until the first coat dries before applying the second. Darker shades take longer to dry. Fast-drying polish does not last as long. Apply a top coat of clear polish to prevent chipping of the coloured polish.
• Moisturise hands and cuticles. This will prevent splitting of the nails and keep them flexible.

Filing your nails

It is time to file the nails when the white part of the nail tip has grown a quarter inch above the pink part of the nail. Filing nails before the nail is a quarter inch long can weaken the nail. Allowing the nail to grow to a length longer than the base pink nail length will cause them to break easily. When filing, go from the corner to the centre in one direction. Follow the groove on the side of your nail.

Problem of split nails

Some women are frustrated by nails that split and crack. Like body shape, skin tone and hair texture, our nails’ ability to grow is largely hereditary. But there are things you can do to avoid much of the splitting.

• Protect your nails from water. Water can actually dry out nails and cause them to split. It is a good idea to wear gloves while washing or doing dishes.
• Make hand cream application a religious ritual. Look for a rich formula that will seal moisture into nails, making them stronger and more flexible. And don’t forget to slather on cream every time you wash your hands.
• Nail polish remover contains alcohol and other chemicals that make nails brittle. Limit their usage.
• Keep nails to a manageable length. A quarter inch beyond the tip of your finger is perfect.

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Why have a tattoo done?

As a symbol of power, rebellion, individuality or self-expression, tattoos are here to stay. Many use tattoos as an expression of feelings toward their loved ones. Others view it as a memorial to a dead parent or friend. “Interestingly, many of our customers are in the 22-plus age group,” says Naveen Kumar, the engineer-turned-tattoo-studio owner of Irezumi, a tattoo and body piercing studio.

How a tattoo is done

The process of picking a tattoo can be a long journey. After all, it is your body and a tattoo is permanent art; so you’d better be sure you like what you’re getting. There are designs aplenty — from angels, barbed wires, Japanese calligraphy, and zodiac signs to everyday designs like butterflies and flowers to a range of tribal art. Designs are purchased from artists the world over or custom designed for a client. The area of the skin where the tattoo is to be done is cleaned and shaved, as even a tiny amount of hair can get in the way. The needles are sterilised and the ink used is usually certified to be safe. Once you’ve zeroed in on the design, a tattoo artist works on the outline in detail, and shading. An elaborate design could take a few sittings while a simple one could take just one session. Black,dark blue and deep maroon colours are the most sought-after because it is difficult to make an impression using a light colour on dark skin. Tattoos can cost anywhere from Rs 2000 Rs to Rs 20000.

How a piercing is done

In case of a piercing, the pierced area is cleaned with alcohol. Disposable needles are used to pierce the skin and surgical steel ornaments are used — unless the customer is allergic to steel, in which case a more skin-friendly metal (gold, diamond) is opted for.

Aftercare tips

It is important to strictly follow the advice of your tattoo artist so it has a chance to blend well into your skin and heal completely.

The first two weeks after you get your tattoo are the most critical in terms of aftercare. The tattoo is like any other wound and is vulnerable to infection, if you don’t care for it.

• Apply the prescribed ointment on the area for the first three days.
• No swimming or exercising at the gym for two weeks is the general advice. This is because water from the pool could cause an infection; also, sweat could dilute the ink on your tattoo.
• Avoid exposure to sunlight.
• It is wise to apply oil and keep the area moisturised.
• Do not wear tight clothes.
• If you have a tattoo on your back, sleep on your stomach, and vice versa.

Does getting a tattoo hurt?

All of us have a different pain threshold and that is what determines the pain you suffer. It feels like a burn for the initial five minutes, say some. But the pain is worth the gain, say others.

New options in tattoos

The team at Irezumi has also tried to integrate tattooing and piercing with the therapeutic benefits of acupuncture, under the guidance of renowned acupuncturist M N Sankar. Increasingly accepted by many as a solution to a range of medical ailments like obesity, hair loss, migraine, sinusitis, liver dysfunction and back pain, piercing certain key body points has proven results in eradicating problems.

The post A Body of Art appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

It ain’t as easy as it sounds to maintain and nourish our skin – but, it is possible.

First, the basics. As you’d know, the skin consists of three layers: the epidermis, the dermis and the adipose, or fatty, tissue. The epidermis produces new skin cells which rise to the surface and are sloughed off. This process happens all over your body. The dermis, or the middle layer, nourishes the epidermis. Three protein-related substances “envelope” this layer: collagen [responsible for skin firmness], elastin [for bounce and resilience], and glycosaminoglycans [GAGs] that help the skin retain its moisture. The adipose tissue cushions the skin and keeps it from sagging. It also gives shape to your face and helps control body temperature.

Why skin ages

By age 30, genetic tendencies start to surface and make their presence felt. Cellular regeneration starts to slow down and the first lines on the face appear. Fat loss may begin by age 40; this results in pouches and folds on your skin. The first signs are horizontal lines that appear across the forehead.

In women, after menopause, the outer layer of the skin takes longer to renew itself. Collagen and elastin, the fibres that stretch and “hold-in” moisture in the dermis, start to break down. A thinner dermis bruises easily and the result is wrinkles and furrows. In addition to this, the skin becomes extra-transparent and the blood vessels become more prominent.

As moisture is released, instead of being retained in the skin, you begin to age, owing to decreased stickiness of the epidermal cells. The number of epidermal cells decreases by 10 per cent per decade and they divide more slowly as you age – this means the skin is less able to repair itself quickly. When collagen and elastin also decrease, the scaffolding of the skin changes, causing it to wrinkle and sag. Sebaceous glands now get bigger, but produce less sebum; the number of sweat glands also decreases. Both these factors contribute to dryness of skin.

The truth about UV, UB and UC radiation

The sun gives off ultraviolet [UV] radiation that we divide into categories based on the wavelength.

• UVC: 100-290 nm
• UVB: 290-320 nm
• UVA: 320-400 nm

UVC radiation is absorbed by the atmosphere and does not cause skin damage. UVB radiation affects the epidermis and it is the primary agent responsible for sunburn. UVA radiation penetrates deep into the skin and its intensity is more constant than UVB without variations during the day and/or throughout the year. Both UVA and UVB radiation cause wrinkles by breaking down collagen, creating free radicals, and inhibiting the natural repair mechanisms of the skin.

Sunscreen: Defence

Sunlight accounts for 90 per cent of the symptoms of skin damage. Most skin experts agree that a good-quality sunscreen with SPF [Sun Protection Factor] 15 or higher is the first and best line of defence against the sun, arguably the skin’s worst enemy. Here is a fact-file about its application for best results.

• The most common mistake people make has to do with application. Using inadequate amounts of sunscreen is of no use. Most people only use 25-50 per cent of the recommended amount. Sunscreen has to be applied liberally on all sun-exposed areas of the skin
• It takes 20-30 minutes for sunscreen to be absorbed; so, be sure to apply it half-hour before stepping outdoors
• It should be reapplied after swimming, excessive sweating, or towelling the body dry. Also, re-apply 2-4 hours after you are out in the sun
• Even when out of a swimming pool, or outdoors, apply sunscreen, or when in the shade. Concrete, sand and water, all reflect harmful rays
• Sunscreen should also be the last product applied on facial skin as some sunscreens can break-down in the presence of water used in water-based foundations and moisturisers.

Alpha-hydroxy-acids: Skin rejuvenation

Alpha-hydroxy-acids [AHAs], derived from fruit and milk sugars, are great skin-rejuvenating products. The following are the five major types of AHAs found in skincare products and their sources:

• Glycolic acid: sugarcane
• Lactic acid: milk
• Malic acid: apples and pears
• Citric acid: oranges and lemons
• Tartaric acid: grapes.

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Chocolates and Valentine’s Day are as inextricably linked as roses and love. In fact, a reputed spa advertised a Chocolate Lover’s Experience as part of their romantic package for a Valentine’s Day gone by. So, what is the real truth? Truth is: when it comes to chocolate, versions, fables, and myths, abound.

Stories of chocolate as an aphrodisiac

The reputation of chocolate as an aphrodisiac originated in South America, almost 1,500 years ago. The American Heritage College Dictionary defines an aphrodisiac as, “arousing, or intensifying sexual desire. something such as a drug, or food, having such an effect.” According to the Food and Drug Administration, US: “An aphrodisiac is a food, drink, drug, scent, or device, that promoters claim, can arouse or increase sexual desire or libido.” The word was coined after Aphrodite, the Greek Goddess of sexual love and beauty.

The celebrated Italian libertine Casanova is said to have consumed vast amounts of chocolate before he embarked on his famous sexual exploits. In fact, he found chocolate more stimulating than champagne and called it “the elixir of love.”

In 1624, Johan Franciscus Rauch, a professor in Vienna, condemned chocolate as an inflamer of passions and urged monks not to drink it. In fact, he went to the extent of having it banned from monasteries.

It is said that Madame du Barry, courtesan and mistress of Louis XV, always served her lovers a cup of chocolate before they entered her bedroom.

History of chocolate as a turn-on

It was the Aztec and Mayan cultures that first discovered chocolate. The Aztecs believed that it invigorated men and lowered inhibitions in the fairer sex. In fact, the Aztecs considered all chocolates an aphrodisiac; so, foods made of chocolate were strictly forbidden for women. Yet another parable states that the Aztecs and Mayans, who were the first to recognize the potency of this food, celebrated the harvest season with festivals of wild orgies. This seems to suggest that they did not have too many objections to women who went wild after consuming chocolate!

The Aztec emperor Montezuma is believed to have drunk fifty golden goblets of chocolate a day in order to enhance his sexual prowess; something he well might have needed with a harem of 600 women!

With all the above attributes chocolate enjoyed, its arrival in Europe only strengthened romantic connections, and it became a popular gift among courting couples.

Chocolate, the mood booster

Chocolate contains two substances, phenylethylamine and serotonin, which are mood-enhancers. Phenylethylamine is released in the brain when people fall in love and serotonin is a chemical involved in sexual arousal. Produced in the human brain they are released into the nervous system when we’re happy and also experiencing feelings of love, passion, or lust. This is accompanied by a rapid mood change, rise in blood pressure, increase in heart rate and feelings of mild euphoria.

Women are supposedly more susceptible to the effects of phenylethylamine and serotonin than men.

Chocolate contains chemicals that induce pleasurable feelings. However, there is no consensus in the scientific community that it should be classified an aphrodisiac, although it contains substances that increase energy, stamina and feelings of wellbeing. For instance, a gift of chocolate makes one feel loved.

As far as research studies go, one appeared to contradict the aphrodisiac associations of chocolate. This study, which included a random sample of about 160+ women in the 35-plus age group, found no significant differences between reported rates of sexual arousal, or distress, among those who regularly consumed one serving of chocolate a day, those who consumed three, or more servings, or those who generally consumed none. As a result, researchers say that if chocolate has any aphrodisiacal qualities, they are purely psychological, and not physiological.

Why chocolate is so popular

• Experts say that one should consume chocolate in small quantities. This restraint, or the “forbidden fruit” lure, of chocolate explains the binge that chocolate-lovers occasionally go on
• Chocolate has strong associations as a treat, or a “bribe.” This adds to its mysterious allure
• Chocolate is credited with being a comforter, a highly desirable food. Women are known to experience special cravings just before the onset of the menstrual period. And, those who find themselves down in the dumps use chocolate to feel better
• Advertisers exploit its romantic associations. Many an advert depicts a young couple bashfully biting into a chocolate bar
• Psychologists see it as an emotional substitute for love. Jilted women are a big market
• Its combination of sweet taste and fatty texture, two characteristics that match our innate eating preferences, gives chocolate its unique melt-in-the-mouth enjoyment
• Its enticing aroma and ability to create “taste memories,” combined with its rich flavour, make it an irresistible temptation.

Updated on 23^rd April 2023

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Hairy facts

We lose about 60 strands of hair from our scalp everyday. It is important to understand that every strand of hair only has a life span of 2-7 years. When it eventually falls, a new hair takes its place. So, there is no reason to lose sleep over the hair you lose everyday — as long as it is being replenished by new hair.

General hair care tips

• The first step to healthy hair is cleanliness. It is perfectly okay to wash your hair every alternate day as long as you are careful about the quality of shampoo you use
• Shampoo and conditioner must be used separately as their benefits are quite different
• Henna has a drying effect on hair, so it is advisable to avoid it
• Make it a point to trim your hair once every six weeks. It helps to keep split ends at bay and maintains your hairstyle
• Treat yourself to a head oil massage once a week. After the massage, steam hair with a wet towel. This helps better absorption of the oil and conditions the hair shaft and follicles
• Remember, hair is at its weakest when wet. Disentangle hair after a shampoo using only your fingers, or a wide-toothed comb
• Change your shampoo and conditioner every two months. Your hair has a tendency to get used to these products, and a chemical deposit accumulates on your scalp when you use a brand on a continuous basis over a period of time
• Regular blow-drying weakens hair roots. But, if your cut requires a blow dryer to set and style, let your hair be half-dry when you use it. Use dryer only to style. This will reduce the duration your hair is exposed to direct heat from the dryer. It is always advisable to use the “cool” setting
• What you put into your body is as important as what you put on your hair. Remember to include plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables in your diet.

Premature greying: Causes and prevention

There are a number of reasons for those strands of grey that sneak in well before time. Diet deficiencies and mental tension are the primary causes. Hereditary factors also predispose a person to premature greying.

• Indian gooseberry or amla is said to be beneficial as a preventive for this condition. Pieces of the fruit are boiled in coconut oil until the mixture resembles charred dust. Applying this dark oil on the scalp is a good remedy. Massaging the scalp every night with a tsp of amla juice mixed with a tsp of almond oil and a few drops of lime juice is also said to work well
• Butter made from cow’s milk, if consumed or massaged into the hair roots twice a week, is supposed to arrest premature greying
• Curry leaves boiled in coconut oil are excellent. The oil, used as a hair tonic, stimulates hair growth and restores pigmentation
• Applying the fresh juice of amaranth leaves helps hair to retain its ebony shade and keeps it soft.

Monsoon tips for hair care

• If you have frizzy hair this can create real problems for you. Apply a good leave-in conditioner to beat monsoon blues. Shampoo your hair, apply the leave-in conditioner, and let it air dry. Do not wash off
• Avoid hot hair treatments. Harsh heat on your hair is very bad during the monsoons. Put your hair dryers away during this season and say a big no to straightening and perm treatments
• It would help to sport a shorter hair style for better maintenance
• If your hair gets wet in the rain, wash as soon as you get back home to keep potential scalp infections at bay
• Avoid hair sprays and restrict the number of hair care products you use
• Use a mild shampoo
• Drink 10-12 glasses of water daily
• Apply conditioner more on the hair shaft than on the roots and scalp
• Eat a protein-rich diet and be sure to include plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables in your meals
• Preferably, avoid a hair dryer. If you must use one, make sure your hair isn’t dripping wet when you turn it on, and hold it at least six inches away from your scalp
• A regular henna treatment is good during the wet weather
• A hot oil massage once a week keeps your hair in good shape.

Help from the Kitchen

By Team CW

If commercial products are not your thing, you can concoct some hair care solutions from ingredients found in your kitchen at home itself. Here are two mixes that work well for your hair in the rains.

Honey and olive oil mask

Mix two parts olive oil with one part honey in a cup. Warm slightly and then apply the mix evenly through your hair. Try and avoid the scalp as it tends to get oily in the rains. Leave on for 15-20 minutes and then wash off with shampoo. This works to condition and repair your hair.

Banana mash

Here’s a quick, effective mask for your hair. Mash a banana, add a dash of olive oil if you like, and smooth over your hair. Let it sit for 15 minutes and then shampoo off with warm water. This works well in combating frizz in the monsoon.

Lemon delight

Lemon juice mixed with water can also be used as a last rinse to give your hair a shiny and bouncy look.

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