I usually focused my attention on the length of the transfer zone, where I would smoothly receive and hand off the baton but this time the coach’s words filled my thoughts. I turned and faced the start line. A loud CRACK from the starter’s pistol and they were off. As the sprinters pounded toward me, one thought repeated in my head: “DON’T DROP THE BATON.”

52 seconds later, our fastest runner streaked across the finish line; dead last. I had dropped the baton.

What went wrong?

We had raced as a team for two years and not once in the hundreds of practices and competitions had I dropped the baton. What had gone wrong this time? Had the coach inadvertently planted the thought in my mind? Would the result have been different if his final instructions were “most of all, pass the baton smoothly and safely”?

I had fallen victim to one of the most fundamental laws of the universe: What you think about most, becomes your reality. It is as certain as the law of gravity.

How affirmations work

Affirmations are verbal declarations, which have a powerful effect on our conscious and subconscious minds and ultimately our actions. They must NEVER be stated in the negative. We must choose our words carefully. Psychologists, neuroscientists and metaphysicians all agree that the subconscious cannot understand or acknowledge a negative. The affirmation, “I don’t [negative] want to be fat” is heard by the subconscious as, “I want to be fat.” We cannot help focusing on the word fat. The positive alternative, “I want to be slim” would be much more beneficial.

Don’t believe me? Close your eyes and repeat this statement three times. “I am not afraid.” Open your eyes. Which word stands out? We cannot help it; even though afraid is what we do not want to be, it is certainly the dominant word our mind focuses on. Now try repeating, “I feel safe.” Notice the difference? What we think and focus on the most becomes our reality. This is true in any aspect of life.

Archimedes formulated the principle of flotation in 200 BC. But Dr Wayne Dyer rightly observed, “The law of flotation was not discovered by contemplating the sinking of things.”

Success follows your dominant thoughts

I have read biographies of many great achievers. They all share a single trait—their thoughts, and thus their actions, are dominated by what they want to achieve. How they might achieve it is secondary. Since they keep thinking about succeeding most, success becomes their reality.

I spend a great deal of time in group homes and institutions talking to seniors. “What is your purpose, your goal, your dream, your worthy cause?” I ask. Sadly, many say they have none. Then I ask, “Well what is important to you, what do you want in life?” More silence. “OK, tell me what you don’t want in life?” Within seconds the responses pour out.

“I don’t want to be sick.”
“I don’t want to be poor.”
“I don’t want to be lonely.”
“I don’t want to be fat.”
“I don’t want to die.”
“I don’t want to die alone.”
“I don’t want to be senile.”

The sad truth is, most people are much better at telling you what they don’t want in life than at telling what they do want in life. What they focus on and think about most is what they don’t want and that becomes their reality.

Can we think your way to sickness? You bet!

Does this hold true for our health? Certainly. Our brain controls every part of our body. The science of biofeedback has conclusively proven that thoughts have the power to control the physical states of our bodies. We can raise or lower our temperature, change our heart rate and blood pressure, and direct blood to different body parts all by our thoughts alone.

Our thoughts can also have devastating effects on our health. The most destructive and toxic element unleashed on the human body is stress. Where does it come from? It’s not a bacterium, a virus, an amoeba, a fungus or mould. Nor is it a burn, trauma or pressure injury. We cannot see it, touch it, cut it, isolate it, weigh it, grow it, inoculate against it or transmit it to another person. It exists only in the mind, but its devastating effects are felt in every physical system of the body.

Stress is produced by what we think of most. Our stressful thoughts manifest themselves in the physical plane and show up in every organ and system.

Most people pay little or no attention to their health until something goes wrong. When the episode passes and the body heals, they often go back to their old habits, thoughts and lifestyles until the next time their body’s defence systems get overwhelmed again. Some, however, heed the warning and start considering and practising disease prevention.

Although this seems like a positive step in the right direction, it can be greatly improved. The problem is we are still focused on disease, even though it is the prevention of disease.

A far more successful strategy would be to focus on wellness. This is not simply semantics. Dominating thoughts of wellness can only lead to wellness.

What are you focussing on?

Do you think any great general in history ever won a battle by focusing on how not to lose?

If your sole goal in life is to accumulate great wealth [I feel sorry for you if it is], do you think there is any chance of attaining it by focusing on how not to be poor. Does the circus performer say to himself, “Don’t fall,” as he steps onto the high wire? Will you ever find love by filling your mind with thoughts of how not to be lonely?

What you think about most becomes your reality. Do not be against illness; rather direct your thoughts toward complete and total wellness and it will become your reality. You possess the power. It’s all in your head.

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The one common reason why we are all stressed

Let’s begin by asking, “Why are you stressed?” Some of you may point to hectic work pressure; some may cite family trouble or marital problems; yet others are stressed because of the struggle between fulfilling one’s needs and controlling one’s wants. But these are all external circumstances. The underlying emotion and root cause of stress is always fear—fear of losing control over a situation or of losing out on something; fear of failing to live according to our belief systems or being unable to live up to people’s expectations.

Get a grip on the situation

To eliminate stress, you must face your fears. Start by asking yourself, “What is the worst that can happen?” Go ahead and imagine the worst. Don’t be surprised if you realise that it isn’t so bad after all and, in fact, it is something you can easily deal with. When dealing with stress and its repercussions, it’s important to peel away our layers like that of an onion. Remember that only you and your reactions are in your control, so start accepting yourself and be honest with yourself. Changing yourself and your perceptions is the key to managing stress.

When dealing with stress and its repercussions, it’s important to peel away our layers like that of an onion

Three common symptoms of stress and the underlying emotions causing them

1. Frequent colds

If you are prone to catching colds, you need to look at your day[s] or life space. You will realise that you have been trying to [physically] be in too many places at the same time or [mentally] resolve multiple situations on your own. Cold is a sign of trying to do too much too soon. All you need to do is breathe, pause and prioritise, allowing some things to unfold in time.

Why are you in such a hurry to get things done? If things spill over to the next day, will your world end? The answer is an emphatic ‘No’! Then why run? Allow yourself to slow down every now and then. Create a to-do list based on priority and not just on your [or somebody else’s] expectations. When helping other people, remember to place your wellbeing first. If your body and health cannot support you, it’s of no help to you or to the people involved. Next, ask yourself if you are taking on more than you can handle. If others are allowed to ask you for help, why can’t you do the same? Give yourself the permission to reach out to people and also to say “no” if and when required.

Remember that one of the things we subconsciously do when stressed is hold our breath. So make it a point to inhale and exhale consciously when you feel stressed.

When helping other people, remember to place your wellbeing first

2. Constant headaches

Do you suffer from chronic migraines? Does your head hurt every afternoon or towards the end of the day? To help yourself on a physical level, don’t have more than two cups of regular tea, green tea or coffee in a day. Ensure that you drink two to three litres of water and eat your meals on time. Also, make sure you aren’t drinking colas and aerated drinks every day.

Emotionally, headaches are a sign of self-criticism. How do you treat yourself when faced with stressful circumstances? How do you address or speak to yourself when placed in high-pressure situations? Being harsh on yourself or constantly judging or putting yourself down can cause severe headaches. The quest for perfectionism may be exhausting your body and mind. Avoid defeatist thoughts and words such as “I’m not capable” or “I’m not good enough”. When you tell yourself that you are incapable of doing something, is it because you genuinely don’t have the skill set or are you afraid of being judged by others?

It’s time to stop criticising yourself. Instead, approve of yourself, your thoughts and your actions. It’s time to stop being the cause of the stress you are facing.

The quest for perfectionism may be exhausting your body and mind

3. Upset stomach

The stomach is responsible for the absorption and digestion of food. A weak stomach, indigestion, irritable bowel syndrome or chronic gastric trouble signals an inability to digest life. Fear is the core emotion that leads to stomach trouble.

What is going on in your life—be it on the personal front, at work, with a group of people or with an individual—that is so difficult for you to accept or handle? Be aware that an unhealthy tummy could be causing those headaches too. Hence you may not be facing a case of self-criticism, but one of being unable to adapt to change or fearing a situation or event.

It is important to introspect and isolate your fears. Ask yourself if your reaction to the said situation or people involved is a force of habit or a reflex. Is it a pattern that is repeating or a case of conflict with your conditioning and beliefs? Often, you can avoid throwing your health off kilter by being open to and accepting different perspectives. Yes, there will be times when the solution to a problem may not be as expected or desired. But it is important to face the changing reality with confidence and have faith in self.

Stress manifests itself in many other ways but physical discomfort and pain is your body’s way of speaking to you. Acknowledge the problem and while seeking medical help, find the underlying negative emotions that need to be eliminated. Know that your fear is an important defence mechanism only as long as you don’t allow it to take charge of your life, dictating every move and every choice you make.

This was first published in the January 2016 issue of Complete Wellbeing.

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