Laughter is the antidote to the stress response

Research shows that people who laugh heartily on a regular basis have lower standing blood pressures than the average population. When we have a hearty laugh, our blood pressure initially increases and then decreases below normal levels. Our breathing becomes deeper, sending oxygen-enriched blood and nutrients throughout the body. With laughter, endorphins and other natural pain-relieving hormones are released, improving our ability to tolerate pain. Our ability to digest food also improves. So you are not only what you eat, but what you think and feel. Research indicates that the benefits of laughter occur as early as a smile.

How can we bring more smiles and laughter into our lives?

Make a joy list

Joel Goodman, Founder and Director of the Humor Project in Saratoga Springs, N.Y. suggests making a joy list: Put down five things you love to do, but have not done in a long time. This could be resuming former hobbies or contacting/meeting people whom you have not seen in a while. Choose two things on that list that you plan to do and write down a date and time when you will do the activities.

Create a humour library

Collect humorous memos, bumper stickers, books, movies and TV shows. The internet is packed with humorous focused websites and videos. Next time you are feeling a little down, read, listen and view.

Spend more time with folks who are fun to be with

Make a commitment to spending more time with those that are fun to be around. Think about someone whom you consider fun to be around. What makes that person attractive? Along with mental alertness and positive attitude, a large part of your answer will lie in them having a great send of humour and a sense of playfulness. Humour is an excellent tool to use on your path in life. Approaching life’s aggravations with humour has fewer harmful side effects, for humour can release feelings of hostility and at the same time provide an acceptable means of expressing and decompressing these feelings in an appropriate way.

Get to know what amuses you

Who are your favourite comedians? What types of humour do you like? For some it’s political humour… “When two politicians accuse each other of lying… they’re both telling the truth”, others like nonsense … “What does a 300 pound canary say?… CHURP!!!”, still others like philosophical humour … “I don’t believe in an afterlife, but I’m bringing a spare pair of underwear just in case.” Put on your humour filtered glasses and you are more likely to notice humorous occurrences that would have passed you by otherwise.

Become comfortable with appearing goofy

Overcome your “fear of foolishness.” C.W. Metcalf and Roma Felible authors of Lighten Up: Survival Skills for People Under Pressure, suggests that when an embarrassing moment happens to you, choose to see it as a humorous incident. This will prevent the negative physiological effects that will occur if you view the event as a life threat [“I was so embarrassed I wish I were dead”]. Take the risk of sharing the incident with others and nine out of ten times they will see the humour and thank you for sharing it.

Checkout the Association for Applied and Therapeutic Humor. They actually have a Humour Academy. A three year course to become a Certified Humour Professional. Yes, I’m a C.H.P. and proud of it!

Humour is the healthiest coping mechanism you can use to deal with the absurdities of life. I used humour to literally get back on my feet after a diagnosis of severe arthritis. If you lose hope and are taken over by fear, you become helpless. If you use humour and focus on a positive outlook you can get through anything. You can learn to use humour like Judo, fending off attacks from a different angle. When the arthritis attacked, humour was my defense.

Remember, if something is thrown at you and you meet it straight on, you will fall backward. This is true for any ‘problem’ that attacks you. If you have a good sense of humour you can slide to the side and look at it from a different perspective. Humour is not a cure-all, but the positive emotions brought on by humour and a good laugh can have a positive effect on your overall wellness.

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Are you living life through the pixilated gauze of a computer screen? Are your conversations with others conducted mostly by keyboard? Does your travel consist of looking at photographs in a magazine? Are your adventures played out vicariously on a game console? Are you more familiar with TV characters than your own neighbours?

As ingenious as technology may be, it can’t replace flesh and blood, fresh air, natural sights, sounds, smells, and physical activity. And you need that. More than you think. Constantly living one step removed from reality, you can easily lose touch with it. And fall victim to the stress, anxiety and isolation of physical detachment. You’ve got to get out more. Be with real people, see real things, and experience live events. There’s no substitute.

2. Take a tech holiday

Spend a day unplugged. No cell phones, TVs, computers, video games, DVDs, personal stereos, [and this is tough] PDAs, or other digitally fed distractions. Instead, strive to have face-to-face conversations, read books, take walks, play with the kids, visit friends, or just sit quietly and think. Find out how soothing and restorative it is to be UNconnected once in a while. And how refreshing it is to take a break from our growing dependency on these devices, which are meant to be tools, not ends in themselves. Keep technology in its proper perspective. And your humanity first and foremost.

3. Lose an argument

That’s right, lose an argument. When was the last time you looked someone squarely in the face and said, “You know, you’re right. I’m wrong. Thanks for straightening me out.” Hard to do, isn’t it? We’d sooner cling to a worthless position than admit we’re in error. But a humbling concession now and then is a great relief. Because it removes the onerous pressure of trying to defend a flawless facade. An image that fools no one. And displays weakness rather than character. [Don’t we see it every day in our politicians?] Lose an argument. Show humility. You’ll gain a lot more respect and credibility.

As ingenious as technology may be, it can’t replace flesh and blood, fresh air, natural sights, sounds, smells, and physical activity

4. Spend time near the water

Whether it’s a stroll along the river, eating lunch by a pond in the park, weekending at a scenic lake, or vacationing by the sea… the mere sight and presence of water is a wonderful balm to a stressed-out soul. Let its naturally soothing effects ease your concerns and freshen your outlook. Let its shimmering expanse free you of the narrowed perspective of a frenzied routine. If, like most people, you’re drawn to water, follow those instincts. It’s nature’s very own tranquiliser.

5. Have more fun in bed

So advised a popular mattress ad. And they had a point. You don’t need a study [like the one mentioned below] to tell you that a healthy sex life can reduce stress. As much as a lack of sex can aggravate it. But today, with our busy schedules and relentless ambitions, sex for many couples has become little more than an afterthought. Sometimes overlooked entirely. This is obviously unhealthy for the relationship. Which adds to even greater stress. Now, the study. According to the Royal Hospital in Edinburgh, a healthy sex life can make you look up to seven years younger, lead to greater contentment and help you sleep better. Why argue? Light the candle, draw the shades and…

6. Observe other people under stress

Notice how they rush things. How tense and wound up they can get. How they’re always apologising for falling behind or making mistakes. How they never seem to be in control, bouncing from one thing to the next, leaving loose ends and unfinished business in their wake. That may be YOU! Or where you’re headed.

So study people under stress and think about how they could improve their lives. [We’re always better at critiquing others, aren’t we?] Then apply that counsel to your own life. You can learn a lot about yourself simply by observing others.

Today, with our busy schedules and relentless ambitions, sex for many couples has become little more than an afterthought

7. Don’t put off that difficult phone call

You know you have to make that call. To appease an unhappy client. To confront another with a serious accusation. To solicit a donation from a skinflint. To ask someone out. To discuss a sensitive issue. To turn someone down. It’s not easy to do so. But it has to be done. The longer you wait, the harder it gets. And the more the anxiety builds. So take a breath. Bite the bullet. Make the call. You’ll feel a whole lot better when it’s done.

8. Entertaining is supposed to be fun, remember?

When you throw a dinner party or host a get-together, it’s not an audition, you’re not on trial and your guests aren’t judges and juries. Yet that’s how you might see it—something to fret about, even dread. Which, if you’re worried things won’t go well, will all but assure it. Remember, it’s not about you. It’s about inviting people into your home and making them feel welcome and comfortable. If you’re tense and unsure, that’s what they’ll pick up on. [How many times have you attended a tautly wound event and had a perfectly lousy time?] So make it fun. Be casual, gracious, spontaneous. You’ll be a hit, and so will your party.

9. Don’t be a slave to your image

How much unnecessary stress, excessive work and lost time with loved ones do you incur in the name of how you look to others? Are where you live, what you drive, how you dress, and whom you socialise with, dictated more by what’s best for you and your family… or by the image you want to project? Carefully scrutinise your motives. You may find that a simpler lifestyle within your means might leave you with less of what impresses others… but more of what makes your life easier, happier and more fulfilling.

When you throw a dinner party or host a get-together, it’s not an audition, you’re not on trial and your guests aren’t judges and juries

10. Don’t trust yourself when you’re upset

You’re furious at someone. Flustered by an embarrassing thing you did. Or upset about a serious blunder you made. In that distressed state, you’re unfocussed, distracted, likely to make costly errors and thus compound the misery you’re feeling. In those situations, it’s wise to consciously slow down and proceed with caution, as if navigating a ship through perilous waters. Even better, don’t attempt anything important or complicated until you’ve had a chance to calm and collect yourself. You can’t see clearly when you’re seeing red.

11. Turn off the music once in a while

You don’t always have to have the radio going in the house and car. The constant drone of music, talk and noise can grow monotonous, be distracting, interrupt your thought process, and become a stressful irritant you’re not even aware of. Take a break now and then. Click off the radio and see how naturally relaxing, soothing and refreshing a little quiet can be. And how peaceful it is to hear yourself think.

12. Look beyond appearances to find the good in people

How callously we judge others based solely on superficial qualities! What someone wears, how they talk, where they live, or what they drive has little to do with their underlying goodness and the emotions they feel. But in our rushed and impatient dealings—to our detriment—we hastily slot people into categories and judge them accordingly.

Think of all the people you’re intimate with today you first estimated unfairly, maybe even joked about, based on outward appearances. Imagine what you’d have lost… when you can’t get beyond stereotyping. The easiest way to accept others is to know them, to discover the person inside. You’ll find that inwardly most people share similar beliefs and aspirations. You want others to understand who you are. At least afford them the same courtesy.

Excerpted with permission from 400 Ways To Stop Stress Now by G Gaynor McTigue. Published by Jaico Books

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