When I was speaking in Tajikistan some time ago, I complimented one of my participants on the ‘sleek’ shirt he was wearing. The next day, he brought me a new shirt exactly like the one he was wearing. I later learned that it is a Tajik tradition to give away the item someone likes and compliments you on. We are talking about one of the poorest countries in the world—now that is true richness!

Using your power

The Corporate Sufi believes that everyone is blessed with power. Some use power wisely and some don’t; many never use their power at all.

Imagine that your Creator offered you the power to have anything you wanted and to do whatever you wanted. What would you ask for? What would you do? Stop thinking about it, because the truth is you already have all the power you need to fulfil your wishes.

If you only want to achieve business success, then all your actions will gravitate towards that single goal. If you also want to achieve balance and to journey beyond, your actions will reflect those goals. The path you choose is up to you.

Your potential challenges to implementing this commitment may include:

• Not knowing how to find your innate gift
• Conditioning from childhood that stifles your gift
• Lacking a goal larger than yourself
• Missing a purpose and focus that will engage your gift
• Fearing the thought of leaving the status quo
• Having an inferiority complex or a lack of self-belief
• Worrying about giving of yourself and being taken advantage of
• Being self-centred.

You have been born with an innate gift. It is the one thing that allows you to live up to your highest potential. When you are using your gift, you are the best you can possibly be, free from fear and other constraints, and full of abundance and life. However, many people go through life without realising what their birth-day gift is, and many die without ever having opened it. It seems a terrible waste to go through life without opening your gift.

The Sufi philosophy affirms that we have all been born with a great gift, although most of us never open it because we are distracted and tempted by dazzling toys and the complications of life, which are only temporary. We forget the real purpose of why we are here and what we need to accomplish.

The Corporate philosophy is similar. The more people focus on their natural strengths, the more excitement and joy they find in their work. The more you focus on employees and on building corporate strength, the more productivity is achieved. However, not all organisations recognise or understand how to champion this philosophy in the workplace.

The Corporate Sufi philosophy leverages your inherent talent or strengths—your gift to make a positive difference in the lives of others.

You are a miracle

You are a miracle! A unique, special and precious human being! There is no one like you in the entire world. No one can smile like you, think like you, walk like you, talk like you or serve like you. From billions of people who have come into this world, no one has been like you. You are special, precious and powerful.

My cousin Asheef and his wife, Denise, were blessed with a baby boy recently. Denise, after being pregnant for nine months, underwent a C-section after 30 hours of labour in hospital before the baby was born. My wife, Farzana, my daughter, Sahar, and I went to see mother and child. While holding the baby, I noticed how alert he was, despite being less than a day old. His big eyes and expressions left me marvelling at creation and how a baby comes into being from the mother’s womb…so full of potential even as early as day one on earth!

When you reflect on creation, witness the birth of a child, observe how the day turns into night and night into day or see the seasons changing, you begin to appreciate the miracle of life.

You are a miracle, and you possess enormous power within, but you need to open your innate gift before you shine. William James, the father of modern psychology, said, “The average person rarely achieves but a small portion of his or her potential.” You may be scared to jump into your inner calling—but if you are stuck in the pond, you will never experience the bounty of the water in the ocean.

In Fihi Ma Fihi, Rumi, the Sufi giant, says, “You have a duty to perform. Do anything else, do a number of things, occupy your time fully, and yet, if you do not do this task, all your time will have been wasted.” In other words, you can do hundreds of things, but if you do not do this one thing that you have a duty to do, you have wasted your life. What is this one thing you must do?

Finding your calling

How do you find your true calling and gift? If you feel it is not practical to find and utilise your gift because of outside constraints, then you are ‘dead’ even before you start. Which means you will never find it because you do not believe it is possible. To find your calling, ask yourself these questions:

• What makes you tick?
• What kind of work makes you lose track of time?
• What kind of work would you do if you won a $40-million lottery? How would it change your life?
• What would you dare to do if you knew that you would not fail at it, no matter what?
• Where can you make the most difference?
• On your deathbed, what is the one regret you would have?
• Reflect on your funeral—what would you like people you care about to say about you?

These questions bring a deeper understanding and perspective about what is important to you.

Meditation is one powerful vehicle to connect to your inner self. Through this practice, you gradually gain insight into your innate gifts. Keeping a daily journal heightens your awareness and brings clarity about who you are, not who you think you are. The cause that excites you the most will give you an indication of what you are passionate and care about.

I wrote this as part of my eulogy: “Azim was a loving father, son, husband and human being. He shined his light and inspired others to shine their light. He lived and worked to his full potential and made a positive difference to one and all, especially those who were less advantaged. May his soul rest in eternal peace. Amen.”

By being clear about what you aspire to be, it becomes easier to invite and attract the right circumstances to lead you to it. Looking back from your deathbed also puts things in perspective and attracts attention to your purpose in life and the accompanying gift you were born with.

The post Sufism at work: Discover your innate gift appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

In this video, he offers five simple “rules” that will help you on your way to finding your calling and living happily. Using personal examples and observations, he helps you understand what makes you click.

About Simon Sinek

Described as “a visionary thinker with a rare intellect,” Sinek teaches leaders and organizations how to inspire people. With a bold goal to help build a world in which the vast majority of people go home everyday feeling fulfilled by their work, Sinek is leading a movement to inspire people to do the things that inspire them.

Sinek is the author of three best selling books: The global best seller, Start With Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action; The New York Times and Wall Street Journal best seller, Leaders Eat Last: Why Some Teams Pull Together and Others Don’t and And his latest book, launched September 2016, is the New York Times and Wall Street Journal best seller, Together is Better: A Little Book of Inspiration.

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Once you go to a government office or a public sector bank and see employees working hard whenever they get time from having endless tea, cigarette, lunch and snack breaks, you realise why so many of our brethren are dying to be labelled backward. If Amroha Nagar Palika received 19,000 applications and that too mostly from BA, BSc, MA, BTech and MBA candidates for 114 posts of safai karamchari [sweepers], you can imagine how scary it is out there.

Conquering the final frontier

It is a huge achievement when you finally get an interview call. So what if it’s after 5,874 rejections, heartbreaks, and ‘how-dare-they-think-I-am not good-enough’ rants! Now that you have reached the final frontier, you transform into a marketeer about to sell a ghastly tasting tea as a weight reducing miracle beverage. Not everyone is your Mom who thinks you are the best thing to have happened to mankind after Darjeeling tea.

I’m not suggesting everyone lies to get a job. But then even Yudhishthira ‘misspoke’ the truth to put an end to a bloody war that lasted 18 days. Thankfully, a typical interview lasts anything between 20 and 30 minutes within which you have to convince a bunch of grim looking strangers that you are the harbinger of their achhe din! This is the time when you get to unleash the power-hungry politician in you and make promises you have no intention of keeping. It does help if you package yourself well and try to look and sound intelligent. After all, not many take Rahul Gandhi seriously despite his impressive lineage.

What you really mean

Remember the time you wooed that hottie online? You told her you were a six feet something who loved surfing and stays up all night reading Plato and Plath with the book placed on his six pack abs. How quickly she fell for you! It helped that she lived
in Nicaragua and would never find that you’d never been near the ocean or the gym and you spend all night watching porn.

Likewise, an interview is an opportunity to be as creative as possible with the truth. If you’ve ever doubted your talents, here’s a concise list of your misspoken truths and what they actually mean.

When you say – I pride myself as a team player and have never had disagreements with my colleagues. I’m patient, understanding and kind to every single person at the office. Even those I don’t get along with.

What you really mean – I work well only with those who agree with me. The ones who have problems with my style of working are either jealous of me or too stupid to recognise my genius.

When you say – I just love what you’re wearing!

What you’re thinking – I hope my desperation to get this job is not showing!

When you say – I have always wanted to work for an organisation with mission, vision and values. It would be a dream-come-true to work here.

What you really mean – I don’t even know what these words mean! But they sound pompous and idealistic; besides, they make me sound good.

When you say – I resigned from my previous job because it did not help me reach my true potential. Of course, the management refused to accept my resignation but I was adamant. Everyone cried at my farewell party.

What you really mean – I just need a new job to hate. When I finally put in my papers, everyone at my office cried with relief. I just hope they all die and to make sure they do, I shall fast for 56 consecutive Mondays.

When you say – I always give my 100 per cent to the organisation.

What you really mean – The decimal that comes right after 1 is only visible to me. Hehehehe!

When you say – If there’s anything I do not like about me is my quest for perfectionism. I don’t mind the extra hours I have to put in to deliver the perfect package.

What you really mean – I have never met a deadline in my entire lifetime and my last boss had a nervous breakdown waiting for me to complete the job assigned to me. Last heard he had relocated to an ashram in Rishikesh where he scours utensils in the kitchen.

When you say – I have never shied from taking a tough call. If you don’t drive accountability, you’d have happy employees but a bankrupt company.

What you really mean – I once caught one of the team members spitting in my tea. Last Diwali someone put a live ‘phataka’ [firecracker] under my seat. It’s a miracle I did not die of heart failure.

When you say – I am an avid reader, traveller, wildlife photographer

What you really mean – Lol, are you kidding me? The only wildlife I have photographed is my wife! I am an avid reader of Facebook posts. And commuting two hours each way to reach my workplace is travel, right?

When you say – Five years from now I see myself as a valuable employee of your esteemed organisation mentoring juniors and helping them realise their true potential.

What you really mean – Five years from now I’ll have your job. When I sit on your side of the table, I’ll make sure nobody gets the job the way I did. By faking it.

Such glib talking will ensure that these fools will fall for you hook, line and sinker. You can now look forward to a match made in heaven. Of course, most relationships are made in China [they rarely last forever], especially the ones based on lies. But while you’re still a couple, you can keep pretending your boss dearest is the best thing to have happened to you in public, and bitch about her in private. Thankfully you won’t have to wait seven years to get the ‘seven year itch’.  At the first signs of restlessness, you can start sailing the ocean in search of a juicier new catch and prepare a new set of lies to net that big fish.

The post The lies we speak in a job interview [and what we actually mean] appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

Reflection is important

If you are in a similar situation, consider that reaching a career plateau is the perfect time for reflection and strategic thinking. If you are in a dead-end job, step back and take a look at where you are, what you have achieved, and make sure you head in the direction you want to travel.

Unhappiness at work arises when you and the job you are expected to do are no longer a good fit. It may have to do with your skills, the salary, values, freedom of action, status, hours and leave, workplace conditions, the organisational culture and advancement prospects. In Sarita’s case, she was upset that there was no freedom to rotate among different departments/divisions, and diversify, and this was hindering her advancement prospects. The fact that she couldn’t choose to move to another field of work, expand her horizons or even move up beyond a certain point/ level frustrated her. Moving to another company would mean taking on a similar job, but her future would still not be any better in
the long term.

Unhappiness at work arises when you and the job you are expected to do are no longer a good fit

If you have been climbing the ladder of success up to this point, maybe you’d like time to be able to stop for a while and enjoy the view rather than rushing to the top? Taking time for reflection is really important for your self-development. When you evaluate how meaningful you find your work, or what meaning you want to find in your work, you have the clues as to your next move. The solution to this problem starts with you. Ask yourself why you are dissatisfied or unhappy.

Wanting to change your job or career means launching research into the alternatives for the future. You have to introspect. Objectively assess what you want different in the future, and what elements of your work need to remain the same.

You could answer some self-assessment questionnaires, seek guidance and advice from career counsellors, discuss with mentors, friends and relatives who know you well, but aren’t biased. If you are not prepared to think carefully about this, or discuss it, there is every chance that you could replicate your present situation.

Framework for career planning

Think first about yourself. What are your work values, job interests, skills and personality traits?

What matters more to you: challenge/achievement, security/stability, variety, risk/enterprise, money/wealth, social impact or autonomy? Make a list of practical considerations such as commute time, location [urban/ semi urban/ rural/ international], scope for transfers and work environment.

Then look at the job market. Look at the types of jobs available, review them and identify some suitable options. You can look at alternative positions, jobs, industries and pick out opportunities that you think you might enjoy and that you have some chance of being offered and you start sending off your applications. You may get lucky that you end up where you really wanted to be, but there is still a possibility that your new career or job may be little better than your old one, and sometimes even worse.

Think first about yourself. What are your work values, job interests, skills and personality traits?

To be really effective in identifying a suitable opportunity, you must do your research well. Take a close look at organisations in the industry you hope to join, understand how they function and what their culture is, and which one would be a better fit for you. Review what you have to offer and what they want from you. Having your personal priorities, values and goals clearly outlined would be very important. However, also be prepared to adjust it to the current scenario.

Here’s what Sarita did. She looked around at further education options, which included post-graduation in Information Security, MBA, Cyber Law, Journalism, an online Master’s degree in sports administration etc., because these were areas of knowledge and work that she had realised would be more suited to her interests, abilities and temperament.

21^st century skills

In the 21^st century, employers are looking for flexibility and adaptability, initiative and self-direction, social and cross-cultural skills, productivity and accountability, leadership and responsibility.

Among younger recruits, they are looking for basic skills like reading, writing, numerical ability, creative thinking, problem solving, visualisation, sociability, negotiation, team work, cultural diversity, leadership, self-esteem, responsibility and a positive attitude to work.

To be really effective in identifying a suitable opportunity, you must do your research well

In more mature workers, employers value more complex skills, particularly business awareness, self-management, communication and team working abilities, and problem-solving. Candidates who are flexible and versatile are in high demand.

A new direction

A completely new career direction is usually based on further education in a specialised field or a professional degree. Full time further education would mean investment of money for tuition and loss of income.

In Sarita’s case, giving up her pay cheque was out of the question. Being far more interested in managerial and executive positions in the IT industry, she decided to take up a part-time MBA specialising in technical/ software business enterprise management being offered by a local business school for those working in the IT industry. She had done her research into the profile of the students of this programme and their eventual career path, and decided that it would be by far the best course of action for her.

If you aren’t in a position to give up your job, and pursue full-time studies, you could either pursue a part-time or distance education professional programme alongside your job, or you make a pitch for a change of profile or career based on the suitability/applicability of your transferable skills.

Rakesh, who was working as a scientist for a decade, wanted to move to a career in science communication and journalism. He decided against any further education, because he felt that he had good oral and written communication skills, strong command of language and a varied range of published papers and articles to make a serious bid for the jobs he was interested in. He accepted the fact that without specific education or certification, he might have to take up a lower rung position in the job market. However, he felt that once he gained a foothold, he could easily bridge the gaps that separated him from those who were already working in field of his interest. His advantage lay in the fact that he had been occasionally writing in magazines and online publications on scientific topics and issues in his own field of research as also in a wider sense, also for the non-scientific public/reader. Hence, he did have some level of proven capabilities to back up his career move.

Ongoing career planning

It is a misconception that you only plan your career when you are fresh out of school/college or when you have lost your job. Work opportunities are changing all the time, and if you do not ensure your employability by acquiring the right skills and moving into areas which offer better opportunities, there is no one else who will do it for you.

It is a misconception that you only plan your career when you are fresh out of school/college or when you have lost your job

A strong professional network that you have built up over the years or by membership of a professional/industry association can provide you the tools/resources to keep up to date with developments in the industry or issues facing the profession. Attending seminars and short training programmes can provide useful networking opportunities or you can use the experience to boost your CV and to build contacts. The idea is to keep working on enhancing your employability on an ongoing basis and to maintain your enthusiasm in your job with learning and awareness of trends and developments in the workplace, both domestic and global.

Whether it is pressure from the impact of a global economy affecting some sectors of employment, or the frustration of employees no longer satisfied with their working environment, career change is now a definite trend. While changing direction can be perilous and often frightening, if you are well prepared, it is not as daunting as it seems. Concentrate on the positive aspects of your new environment, even if it does include many unknowns. Think of the changes in your life as part of a great adventure offering you the golden opportunity of a new beginning.

The post Hit a plateau in your career? Here’s what you can do appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

But for those of us who do go back to working, whether as a full-time career mom, a part-time mom, or a work-from-home mom, we’re all looking for that elusive balance that lets us feel fulfilled in our roles, without leaving us frazzled and spent.

Here are some thoughts to consider as you straddle both worlds.

1. Evaluate objectively

Is the job of a full-time, stay-at-home mom without pay a viable option for you? After considering the alternatives, if working outside home is the only logical path at this time, then weigh the benefits and costs in detail. Is that what you want? Have you checked with your employer about flexibility of work schedules, or perhaps even going part-time? Having your own money, taking your dream vacation, advancing in your career, versus, paying for a crèche, extra responsibility, less time with your baby are just a few of the things you need to consider. If the pros outweigh the cons, you are better equipped to face the challenges that come with this decision.

2. Reliable childcare

Although dads are actively parenting these days, mothers see themselves as the primary caregivers. Be it because of societal pressures or biological instinct, it is a worldwide phenomenon that moms feel the most affected by this initial separation from their new baby. If parents or other trusted family members are able and available to look after the baby, it can prove to be the ideal solution. But, in contemporary society family support is not easily available. This is where certified childcare centres come in; if there is one near your work or home, or on your commute route, vet them thoroughly. Visit the premises and ask if they have CCTV feeds or other forms of all-day access to your child so that they are transparent about their care-giving procedures. If leaving your baby in a strange environment outside home does not appeal to you, consider legitimate au pair, babysitter or nanny services. Word of mouth recommendations go a long way in this field.

3. Dry run

Get into your new routine a few days before, rather than waiting till the first day of returning to work. Rehearse the babysitting arrangement. Drop your child off at the nursery and stay away all day, just as you would on a regular work day. It is better to deal with the emotional turmoil that comes with this step now, than on the first day at work. If you’d prefer to have a nanny, leave your baby in her care and be away for a few hours. Start the separation process slowly by stepping away during naptimes so you feel less stressed, knowing that your baby doesn’t realise your absence. Get a sense of how much time you will have to spend with your baby before and after work, and try to make it count by earnestly doing what matters most for you and your family. Lay down some foundations for the division of parental responsibilities. Who is in charge if the baby wakes up late at night? Who gets diaper duty? Who takes time off to take the baby to the paediatrician? Whatever you agree on, as long as it works for both parents, it is the right arrangement.

4. Time management

Make your weekly ‘to-do’ lists short and relevant. Prioritise tasks: doctor appointments, bills to pay, grocery shopping, and quality time with your baby may take precedence over attending birthday parties or spending time on social media. Resist over-committing and let other non-essential things slide. If you are the main meal-maker at home, then plan a weekly menu. Find ways to make your everyday tasks efficient and streamlined. After tucking in your baby for the night, spend a few minutes preparing for the next day—whether it is packing leftovers in your lunchbox or laying out your work outfit, or gathering the baby’s things for the next day.

5. Long-term view

So you are not making baby food but getting a jar of baby food this week; so you are with your baby only 15 hours a day, instead of 24×7; do you feel that it might reflect badly on your maternal standing? Consider who you are trying to please. If it is not yourself, and you are worried about what others will think, it is the wrong approach. When your baby is a beaming teenager, will they mind that you did not make mushy foods from scratch when they were infants? Or that the house was not immaculately clean? Or that you sought some assistance in keeping them safe and happy till they could go to school? Not really. What they will know and appreciate is that you were there for them when they needed you, and that you were working hard and doing all you could to give them that one degree of advantage that will make a difference in the long run. Firmly establishing your long term goals will let you gauge the everyday demands.

6. Get past the guilt

Parenting styles have changed over the years to meet the needs of a new generation. The world we are living in is very different from the one our parents and grandparents grew up in. The consciousness now is higher, thereby making the issues more complex. Whether it is not being with your baby but at a desk job, or being exhausted from a tough day at work, or being cranky because you are sleep-deprived—guilt can nag a new mother. Fight the rising guilt! Refuse to feed it. You are committed to giving your attention, care, and love, freely and happily to your baby and your family. And that is what matters in the end.

7. Reject perfection

Do not confuse perfectionism with self-improvement. Perfectionism is about gaining approval from others, whereas self-improvement lets you introspect and audit each situation for its merits and limitations, and allows you to do what seems fit, what makes you feel better. Know that mess is okay. You don’t have to judge yourself on your housekeeping skills or your cooking prowess, and neither should anybody else. Learn to laugh at the ridiculous expectations placed on you by others or by yourself. Adopt the popular attitude that ‘My house is clean enough to be healthy, and messy enough to be happy.’ Laundry can pile up, unwashed dishes can wait. Resist the urge to be an impeccably dressed and charmingly witty super-mom who attends to her baby’s every need with a smile. Tempting as it may be, to project an image of having-it-all-together when you don’t is not only tiresome but also detrimental to your sanity.

8. Schedule ‘Me’ time

Maybe ‘me’ time for you is during your commute to/from work. Alternate the evenings with your spouse to get the baby settled in for the night; and use that extra time to pursue a hobby, take a bubble bath or treat yourself to a movie. You won’t prove anything by taking on the full duty of caring for your baby every moment of day. There is a reason why airplane safety instructions say apply the oxygen mask to yourself first before you help your child. Even setting aside 30 minutes a day to do whatever the mood calls for, gives you the oxygen to restore yourself. Make time for exercise! Remember to eat healthy and get enough rest.

9. Advantages of social media

Mothers all over the world are living through similar struggles and many are sharing their insights via blogs and social media, as well as dedicated mothers’ groups. Seek out like-minded moms and connect with their shared experience. With the isolation that comes with present-day lifestyle, we are that much more anxious about tarnishing our kids’ lives and psyches. We tend to over-protect our kids and be extremely harsh on ourselves. One thing that makes it easier is peer support from the global village. Thanks to the technological advances of our century, we can forge a bond with strangers halfway across the world, who are willing to pipe up and say ‘I feel the same way you do!’ and are able to provide the wisdom and collective knowledge of this sorority.

Some days you are a better employee and not so much an ideal mom; some days you are an energetic mum but not so much a fantastic friend; some days you go for a foot-massage and leave the meal-making to your spouse; and some days you are more than happy to just cuddle with your baby all day. Knowing that we cannot live up to being everywhere and doing everything is the first step to recognising that we are in control of defining what balance means to us.

Work-baby balance is a dynamic entity. There is no such thing as perfect balance. There are work-life choices we make, which come with their own consequences. When you realise that you are not required to have super powers and do it all, you will be able to decide where you want to expend your energy most effectively and happily. Ultimately, as long as you are happy, your family is happy. When you are doing the best you can, and you are at peace with your chosen course—that’s balance.

This was first published in the October 2014 issue of Complete Wellbeing.

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His interview coach helped him script his story to make his work history look much stronger and coherent. They crafted perfect albeit not-quite honest responses to the most likely interview questions. He memorised them and then practised giving the answers in a way that didn’t reveal that they were prepared in advance. He and his coach worked all the way down to deliberately inserting “ums…” to make Rahul’s answers seem natural. The coach video-recorded his performances and gave Rahul feedback on when he wasn’t sounding natural or otherwise could polish his act.

Desperate jobseekers

When you really want a job, it’s tempting to do whatever it takes to sell the employer on you. In such a situation, it’s difficult to remain ethical and rational and think, “I’ll reveal my real self—beauty marks, warts and preferences alike—so the right employer will say yes.” But disclosing that ethical rationality is what I’m asking, no, begging of you to do.

You must think of your role in a job interview this way: You’re trying to facilitate a wise match between the employer and candidate.

Your obligation to be ethical

Why an obligation? First, you do have an obligation to yourself. If you accept a job for which you’re a poor fit, you’re more likely to be unhappy, unsuccessful or even fired. And then you have to explain to subsequent prospective employers why you were dumped.

I recall a woman who was eager to work for a website that aggregated articles for women over 50. A job in that company’s IT department became available and although her IT experience was very light, she applied, exaggerating her IT competence. She prepped very hard to sound perfect in the interview and got the job. She struggled on the job, indeed screwing up the website on a number of occasions. Finally, six months later, she crashed the entire site, at which point she was fired. That’s when she came to me for career counselling. She had had quite a time trying to explain her previous six months to prospective employers.

You also have an obligation to others; for example, to the more worthy applicant that would be denied the job. So many of my clients experience righteous indignation when they learn of far less competent people getting hired for a job while they, having searched honourably for a job, sit unemployed.

Then there’s the obligation the job seeker has to that prospective employer and the co-workers who would be saddled with a worse employee than necessary. Imagine you were that boss and you later found out that the candidate you hired had been less than honest in his interview, and you had plenty of other candidates you could have chosen.

And you have an obligation to society, too. When a wrong employee is hired, the company’s customers might, at least in a small way, have to endure worse products or services. Just think of how you feel when you must deal with an incompetent sales or customer service person.

And, although this is an abstract concept, you also have an obligation to the cosmos—to do that which serves justice.

Ask the right questions

To facilitate a good match being made between employer and employee, ask questions early on in the interview such as, “In the end, what will be key to doing this job well?” If the employer’s answer makes you doubt you’re the right person, you have an obligation to explain the basis for your doubt. For example, if the employer makes it clear that the ability to troubleshoot Oracle’s multiplatform supply-chain software is a big part of the job, then you should ask what’s involved and then explain what you know solidly, what you may be able to muddle through and what you would need to learn from scratch.

Of course, some keys to being a well-suited employee go beyond the hard skills and even the intelligence to do the job. Success often depends on the employee’s personality matching with the boss’s and workgroup’s style. Let’s say you’re laid-back, work slowly and steadily, and prioritise work-life balance with an emphasis on the ‘life’ part. You’d obviously be a poor fit for the typical high-tech company in which long, hard-driving workweeks are expected. So, in the interview, you must ask questions like, “Tell me a little about the organisation’s work culture. What are the working hours like, how much training and feedback is given, how autonomous do you expect employees to be, how central is teamwork?”

I, for instance, dislike being on teams—I must force myself to not dominate. I also get impatient with low-performing team members. So, if I were looking for a job, I’d stipulate up-front that I enjoy and do well when given even an intellectually demanding project with a tight deadline that I can tackle by myself but that I’m typically unhappy when the work is mainly to be done as a team.

What about your career wart?

What if you have a career wart that would likely eliminate you immediately from consideration? Case in point, what if you’ve had a gap in employment bigger than the Taj Mahal? Make that evident in your application but if you haven’t, mention it at the beginning of the interview—get the bad news out of the way early. Say something like, “If that’s a deal killer, I wanted to let you know now before we waste each other’s time.”

I’d make a similar disclosure if I had a handicap that would require the employer to make significant accommodations or tolerate something that would impede my performance.

Or in an extreme example, let’s say I just spent the last five years in prison for robbery. If I disclose that, even with a compelling promise to be committed to an ethical life and  that I’m willing to start at the bottom, most employers will reject me. But a right one, a person who perhaps himself has been given a second chance, will hire me. And that’s the sort of person I want to work for anyway.

In sum, many employers will reject you for your honesty, but a right one will consider you. It’s worth taking longer to find a job in exchange for landing one based on legitimacy than on deceit.

How answering honestly is both ethical and pragmatic

Integrity is also important when answering questions. If you don’t know an answer, rather than lying, say so. That yields pragmatic as well as ethical benefit. Not only does that show you’re honest and comfortable enough in your skin to admit not knowing something, your brief answer [“I don’t know”] results in a larger proportion of the interview spent talking about what you do know than about what you don’t.

How to end an interview?

At the end of the interview, it’s often wise to ask, “So, based on what I’ve said—and as I think you can tell—I’ve tried to be scrupulously honest in my answers—do you think I’d do a good job in this position?” That encourages the employer to raise an objection, which you may or may not be able to counter. In either case, it facilitates both of you making a wise decision: whether s/he should offer you the position and whether you should accept it.

Job interview as first date

Think of your job interview not as a sales pitch but rather as a first date. You’re both trying to figure out if you should get involved with each other.

Thinking in the cosmic scheme of things

There is one other motivator for maintaining integrity as the number one priority. The employer will likely be impressed with your candour, an attribute that is all too rare, and so will believe your claims of strengths. As a result, if you don’t get that job, when a more appropriate position becomes available within that company or at another one that the employer knows about it, you’ll likely be seriously considered and more likely to be successful at that job.

And that’s not only to your betterment but also to that of your employer, co-workers, and customers. Besides, it’s good karma.

 This was first published in the March 2015 issue of Complete Wellbeing.

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You are here for a reason

You were born into this world for a reason. You are here for a nobler purpose than just to eat, sleep, produce offspring, and die. You are here to make a difference. You are here to shine your light and leave the world in better shape then you received it. You are here to display the gifts you have been blessed with. You are here to use those gifts to make a contribution and create significance.

There is no one like you in this world. No one in this world can match your smile, style, or DNA. No one in this world can speak like you or think like you. You are unique, gifted, and special. And your gifts are tied to your purpose. When you do things you were born to do and use your innate gifts to make a difference, you are living and working with purpose.

When you live with purpose, you are energised and focussed, and have a sense of direction. You are concentrating on things that are important to you. Your life has meaning and direction, and you are able to pay attention to your work, family, and spirituality.

What a purposeful life looks like

“When love and skill work together, expect a masterpiece,” wrote John Ruskin, the Victorian artist, scientist, poet, environmentalist, and philosopher.

All of nature is on call, operating in silence and yet on purpose. The mighty oak was once a little nut that stood its ground. The acorn contains the design for the fully developed oak tree in all its mightiness. Where you find purpose and strong principles, there you find success and balance.

A ship would never sail without a destination. Similarly you can’t find fulfilment without having a clear objective. When you have purpose, you know where you are going, and you know why you want to go there. You are driven to get there. A sense of purpose creates energy, meaning, gumption, and love. You lose track of time doing things that have a solid purpose.

Purposeful living enables you to know what’s really important in your life. You should not confuse important things with urgent things. In fact, there is an inverse relationship between what’s urgent and what’s important. What is important is generally not urgent. Things become urgent only if we have neglected to do them. Focussing on urgent things can lead to imbalance. Although many of us are aware of the differences between urgent and important, most of us are unaware of where our time disappears.

Why bother about purpose

“The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work,” commented Richard Bach, author of the best-seller Jonathan Livingston Seagull.

When you enjoy your work, you are more efficient and effective. Doing what you love in a conducive environment invites passion and makes it easier to wield your talent with maximum effect. You understand the bigger purpose of your work. You’re like the mason who knows that he is building a cathedral instead of just laying stones.

When you do purposeful work, you feel guided by principles. Your principles are the anchor, providing a source of steadiness amid tumultuous circumstances. If your anchor is bendable, then it will not hold the boat in place properly. In the words of Abraham Lincoln, “Important principles may and must be inflexible.” If principles can be bent, they cannot serve as reliable guides to behaviour.

Doing what you love in a conducive environment invites passion and makes it easier to wield your talent with maximum effect

Obstacles to living a purposeful life

Few of us have personal direction early in life. Instead of choosing our own ideal jobs, we let the jobs choose us. Most jobs look great if you don’t really know what you’re looking for. If you haven’t really decided where you want to go in your career, there are too many bewildering paths to take.

Many people seem to follow the same pattern in work or marriage: They leave a job that they’ve found unfulfilling and find the same kind of job next time around. The same applies for people who get divorced: They seem to end up marrying the same kind of person again. They then blame bad fortune and never realise that they simply didn’t reflect long enough or deep enough to decide what sort of work they wanted or what sort of spouse best complemented them.

Take the example of Leslie, who works as an administrative assistant for an average-sized company. She doesn’t like her job. She is interested in a job with more personal interaction. She finds her employer unreasonable and demanding. Every day she comes home miserable. This has affected her marriage and her relationship with her children. She has done this for 11 years. She is now 45 years old and feels that it is too late to change jobs.

It’s not too late. She has to make the choice to live with purpose. That choice will exact a price in the short run, but she will be far better off in the long run.

She must identify what she loves to do and what her innate gifts are. If she has not been happy with her job, the chances are that she is part of the problem. She is probably not working at her optimum, and her attitude is not positive. This contributes to the flawed relationship with her employer and to her less-than-optimum performance. It’s a lose-lose proposition.

Leslie can bring about a change in her life through lifelong learning, exploring options about her work and career, and discussions with her family about her dilemma.

“Successful and unsuccessful people do not vary greatly in their abilities,” according to John Maxwell, leadership trainer and author of the book Developing the Leader Within You, “They vary in their desires to reach their potential.”

Your principles are the anchor; if your anchor is bendable, then it will not hold the boat in place properly

Strategies to overcome these obstacles

Here are some ways to overcome obstacles to living a purposeful life at home and at work:

» Clarity of purpose

“The sole purpose of education is to help you find out what you, with all your heart, must love to do,” wrote Jiddu Krishnamurti, India-born 20^th century philosopher.

And American author Robert Byrne wrote, “The purpose of life is to live a life of purpose.”

This wisdom from East and West boils down to this: To achieve a meaningful and significant life, you must have a vision and a mission statement that tells how you expect to implement that vision.

That means you can’t pick your line of work randomly. When making that choice, it’s important to reflect, take a long look inside yourself, and answer some hard questions about who you are and what you want. The key to purpose lies within you.

The Sufis, a mystical branch of Islam, have a story about a man who lost his keys and searched for them in the street. A friend came by and helped him search. Finally, the friend asked, “Where were you when you lost your keys?”

“In the house,” replied the man.

“Then why aren’t you looking for them in the house?” asked the friend.

“Because the light’s better in the street,” came the reply.

You have to look for the key to purpose where it lies—within you—and not where it’s more convenient or less painful to look.

You can help identify your purpose by asking two questions:

1. “If I were to die today, what would be written on my tombstone?”
2. “If I had six months to live, how would I spend my remaining days?”

These questions put things in perspective. To answer them, you need to form a vision of what you want to be. You must identify your mission in life and describe that mission in a mission statement.

A mission statement can help you to remove the dust from the mirror so you can see clearly. You must separate truth and reality from the illusionary. You need a great deal of courage to challenge your beliefs and reach out to reality. If you are too caught up with the mundane, illusionary things of life, it will be difficult to get clarity.

Whenever you are confused about a course of action you need to take, you can go back to your mission statement and find the clarity of purpose there.

When you are clear about your vision, and believe in your ability, you invite help from the Universe. A thousand unseen hands come to your assistance. The universe conspires to help you. So sing the song that you have come here to sing; do not just string and unstring your instrument. Work in areas of your calling. Keep your eye on your goal, and see how energised and motivated you become.

If you are too caught up with the mundane, illusionary things of life, it will be difficult to get clarity

According to the Buddhist tradition of the Right Livelihood, the right work gives you a chance to develop your abilities and overcome your own ego-centeredness. When you find yourself doing purposeful work, in your area of interest, it will energise you. Michael Jordan was a great basketball player, but he did not do nearly as well in baseball.

If you are not enjoying your work, you’ll never become accomplished at what you do. Finding the right work comes from having both clarity of vision and clarity of mission. Developing mission statements both for your profession and for your family becomes crucial for clarity. Finding alignment between the two brings about congruence. A mission statement reveals the principles by which you would like to operate your life. It reflects your deep values and connects with your calling in life.

To help you achieve clarity, ask yourself the following:

• Do you know the one thing you must do?
• Are you spending your life stringing and unstringing the instrument instead of singing your song?
• Do you keep your eye on the goal or on the obstacles?
• Do you see and feel your goal and vision regularly?
• Is your work mission aligned to your personal mission?
• Do you know why you are doing what you are doing?
• Is your work your greatest delight?
• Does your purpose make a difference to others?
• Do you know that you are born with a mission to make a difference?

» Your shared vision

“The passion of a shared vision empowers people to transcend beyond petty, negative interactions,” according to Stephen Covey, author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.

When you have a shared vision there is harmony among members of your work team and of your family team. You waste less time arguing about where you are going, and you tend to pull together towards your mutual goals. All this helps with balancing your life, because it saves time and energy.

You do not live on an island. You have needs and responsibilities outside yourself. Therefore, having a shared vision at home and at work makes a lot of sense, and increases your chances of success. All family members need to buy into the vision. The same goes for your work team. Without involvement, team members will make no commitment.

» Choose wisely

People today are inundated with choices. They range from too many brands of cereal to too many career choices, to too many life choices. It all gets a bit overwhelming. The variables you deal with include where you will live and work and what’s important for the family, for the children, and for you.

Choices create your destiny, and choices must be aligned with your purpose in life. As you choose, so you become.

When you choose to spend time with the family, you are choosing wisely. Azim recalls a dinner date he had with his daughter, Sahar, then 10 years old. As the dinner progressed, Azim was deeply moved [and even a little surprised] at how Sahar opened up and started to share of herself—her joys and her struggles. Azim was amazed at her candour and depth. In the intimate and honest connection they formed a good friendship. Azim felt he came to know his daughter on a deeper level.

When we spend time with our children, we build a powerful bond. Quality time is not enough; we also need to spend quantity time with them as well, especially when they are young. So the choices we make at home create balance or imbalance.

Making decisions about what you want in life means starting with yourself and not with the external demands of any situation. It’s important to discover what is unique about yourself, what things in life really motivate you, and where your joy springs from.

» Be willing to take risks

If you want to live with purpose, you must be willing to take risks. No objective worth pursuing comes without effort or risk. When you begin taking calculated risks that take you towards your objective, you feel more energetic and balanced. You foreclose the possibility that you will later find yourself saying, “If only I had taken that chance.” This energy and balance also carry over into your personal life. This underscores the importance of seizing the moment; of reaching for the stars while you’re gifted with youth, energy, and a sense of adventure. But your reach should not be blind. It must be guided by reflection and planning. Many of the seniors we’ve interviewed have told us they wished they had been more reflective in their prime. Many of them had been so caught up in the moment of action that they often lost focus on the meaning of what they were trying to accomplish.

Life moves at an ever-quickening pace, and by the time you’ve finished preparing and establishing yourself, its time to shift gears. Phase II, the second half of your life has arrived, and the days, weeks and years pick up speed like a river current approaching rapids. Suddenly your children are grown, your grandchildren are arriving, and you’re the age your parents were when you first thought of them as ‘old.’ Time is suddenly the most precious currency in life, and you regret taking the risk-free course and holding back from doing the things you love doing.

Seek integrity not security. Integrity comes when you choose the work you love and are born to do.

When you begin taking calculated risks that take you towards your objective, you feel more energetic and balanced

» Eliminate doubt from your life

To have doubts is to be human. But doubts are energy drains that bring on imbalance. They are stumbling blocks you need to clear out of your life.

It’s true that a degree of uncertainty keeps you from being careless; it’s the thing that makes you suddenly remember that you haven’t checked whether the stove was turned off or the doors were locked. A little uncertainty is OK if it keeps you on guard against dangerous situations.

Some people allow themselves to feel like failures when they encounter obstacles to reaching their goals. Others treat the obstacles as temporary detours. They quickly find ways to return to the main road and continue toward their objectives. They never stop believing they’ll get there. To them, one inch of doubt is too much. Never doubt your intentions or your desires. Have faith in the unknown and be your own biggest fan. When you believe in yourself, everyone else does too.

» Aim for authenticity, not charisma

While being charismatic and dynamic are wonderful traits, being authentic is being precisely what the world perceives us to be. We can’t fool people. They can see us coming a mile away.

Success is secular, and significance is spiritual, just as happiness is transient, but joy is lasting. Significance is influenced by passion, and passion is the result of purpose. Being leads to doing. It’s not, I do and therefore I am; It’s I am, and therefore I do. Sounds heavy, but really it is a basic understanding about life and living and how work fits into all that. Let who you are dictate what you do.

During your work life, you’ve undoubtedly encountered the advice that you compile a ‘to-do list.’ It’s a standard tool of time management. We suggest that you prepare a ‘to-be list’ and a ‘stop-doing list.’

Authentic people know their strengths and weaknesses and are not afraid to be honest about both sides of their personalities. But charismatic people seek to hide their weaknesses behind their darker side. If you look back on your life, you’ll probably find that the teachers who made school life more meaningful for you weren’t necessarily the most knowledgeable instructors, but they were authentic people. They imparted a full sense of themselves and were able to transmit a more complete idea of humanity that made you want to be real and authentic too. Authentic individuals embody the values they advocate, and can model the new way of doing things. Authenticity linked to purpose creates synergy and meaning. On the other hand, charisma, if it is charm without substance, can be problematic.

Authentic people know their strengths and weaknesses and are not afraid to be honest about both sides of their personalities

Azim was once asked to introduce a colleague at a seminar. Azim poured his heart out in the introduction. It was the kind of introduction that Azim would want someone to give him. The praise was authentic; the colleague’s virtues were not exaggerated. The power of the introduction was heartfelt and sincere, and came with the right intention. When you give to others what you need most, your gift comes from the depth of authenticity and security. Azim admits that this has not always been easy for him to do.

When you practice authenticity in the family it is much more stable, happy, and balanced. The focus is on how you can support each other. There is no energy drain brought on by negativity and defence.

Authentic living means you are living in tune with your calling and your purpose. It means going to the source. It means no more lying to oneself.

As Azim puts it: “The whole world can think you are great, but if you do not feel that way from deep within, the world’s opinion means little. What counts is being true to your deeper self, not to others’ opinions about you.”

» Be transformational, not transactional

Transactional leaders focus on what they want to say; transformational leaders focus on the need to feel and believe.

Your beliefs lead to your behaviours, and your behaviours lead to results. It isn’t what you and I say that matters; it’s the effect it has long after we’ve said it. Transformational individuals recognise that it isn’t something you do in front of your clients that impresses them; it’s something you do with your clients. When clients ‘own’ what you share and ‘invest’ themselves in it, transformation is a likely result.

You feel it and hear it and see it when you have a transformational effect. Transactional people change behaviours; transformational people change hearts and minds. Transformational people do not do things that are temporary and short-lived. They tend to build long-term relationships. They make huge changes, create great progress, and produce a metamorphosis through which the thing that is transformed becomes greater than its parts.

Conversely, transactional people focus on the transaction—the give-and-take with a short-term outlook; the ‘You-scratch-my-back-and-I’ll-scratch-yours’ kind of attitude. They tend to make a lot of noise, but create only a splash. Transactional people drink beer, burp and then go to sleep. Anyone can do that. Transformation requires much more than that.

Transactional people change behaviours; transformational people change hearts and minds

Howard Hughes and Elvis Presley are both examples of men who led lives of great accomplishment and reached great heights of fame and popularity, but died in misery amid all their wealth. Neither appears to have gone beyond the pursuit of personal gratification to become a transformational force in the world.

Elvis left behind a great body of music and movies. He left his indelible stamp on generations of music. And he was known for random acts of generosity. Yet he never attempted to use his wealth and influence in a focussed way to bring about a better world.

Howard Hughes had brilliant achievements in movie-making and in the aircraft industry, leaving behind movies as Hell’s Angels, Scarface and The Outlaw and making genuine contributions to aircraft design and performance prior to the World War II. But he spent his final years as an enigmatic recluse. He used his wealth to pursue his personal interests. At the time of his death, his estate was valued at $2 billion, but his sole act of philanthropy was the founding of the Hughes Medical Institute. Since his death, the institute has become the nation’s largest private source of support for biomedical research and science education. But it achieved that status almost by accident, and under the guidance of leaders who created a vision for it that went well beyond Hughes’ dream of a tax shelter for his aircraft business.

Transformation comes about when you are purpose-centred and not ego-centred. A family that follows a ‘transformational outlook’ has a far better chance of having lasting relationships than a family that follows a ‘transactional outlook.’

» Create intentional congruence

To be congruent means to be in agreement, to harmonise, or to correspond. When your life is in congruence, anything and everything you do is in harmony with your core values and principles. Intentional congruence means that you intentionally get involved in projects and associations that connect harmoniously with each other and with your overall core values and principles.

You know you have it when two or more of your activities and strategies cumulatively create more than either could create separately. Nido’s network of interests provides a model. He is a professional speaker, which feeds into his consulting, which feeds into his magazine publishing, which leads to business for his public-relations firm. Everything he does has an interlocking relationship with everything else he’s involved in. The result is maximum effectiveness and productivity.

Living a life of congruence invites balance. You can achieve that congruence by examining the purpose of your life and connecting everything you do to that purpose. It is important, therefore, to determine what you want to place at the centre of your being – what you want to become the source of your core motivation.

When your life is people-centred, the important thing to you is what others want. When it’s possession-centred, the important thing is what you have. When it is activity-centred, the important thing is what you do. These are all external sources of motivation.

When you put principles at the centre of your life, you have a solid, unwavering foundation for decision-making

But when your life is principle-centred, the important thing is who and what you are. Your core motivation lies within you. The principles we live by determine our character—the essence of who we are.

When you choose an external source of core motivation, you place yourself at the mercy of mood swings, inconsistent behaviour, and uncontrollable changes of fortune. When you put principles at the centre of your life, you have a solid, unwavering foundation for decision-making.

When we live by our principles, we are being true to ourselves. This is quite different from being self-centred. Self-centred people don’t reach out to others, and don’t concern themselves with others’ interests. They therefore live their lives in emotional isolation, often developing mental-health problems. Intentions and desires come from your spiritual nature. Release them to the universe to take over, remembering that the universe knows more about you than you know about yourself. Surrender to its timing. Just as every seed embodies huge potential, so too does every person. Just as the seed must give itself to the fertile ground to reach its potential, so too must we give ourselves to the universe around us.

» Stay in the big picture

Don’t lose sight of your big picture as you get caught up in the activity of life. In every problem lies an opportunity, so focus on the opportunity and the solutions. Maintain positive energy. Decide your priorities based on your shared vision, and act accordingly. Just thinking of your goals is not enough; you must take action to fulfil those dreams and make them happen. When your thinking arises from your goals, it results in wise choices that will help you accomplish those goals.

» From here to there

Fulfilment comes from closing the gap between where you are and where you want to go. To close that gap, you begin with two questions: ‘What do I want?’ and ‘How am I going to get it?’

Once you have answered those questions, you will be fired up for action. Your sense of purpose will make it clear what your goals are. Finally, it will erase the doubts and negativity and stop those anxiety-causing questions such as ‘What good is my life?’ or ‘Why am I doing all this anyway?’

“Everyone has a purpose in life—a unique gift or special talent to give to others,” says Deepak Chopra, noted authority on holistic medicine. Note the phrase ‘to give to others.’ Your sense of purpose must involve more than raw numbers. If your purpose is to make $100,000 a week, achieving it is unlikely to give you a warm sense of accomplishment.

Fulfilment comes from closing the gap between where you are and where you want to go

Nido’s sense of purpose is vividly illustrated by his wills.

He has a conventional will that details what happens to his material goods when he dies. That’s simply a mechanical instrument, designed to transmit his material assets to his heirs while minimising the tax burden on them. He lets a lawyer handle that. The ones he spends his own time on are his ethical wills.

He has written a private document to each of his four children that says, “Material things come and go, but let me tell you what I’ve left for you that will stay with you all your years and, even more important, which you can pass on to many generations thereafter.”

This ethical will talks about values, about purpose, about character. This is an example of a far deeper wealth and sense of purpose in life, carrying more meaning than just material wealth.

Finally it is important to know whether you are actually living on your purpose. Self-awareness aids in the making of choices. In his Journal for Lasting Happiness: Your Key to Success, Azim encourages each person to write a daily journal as a habit of self-reflection. When you increase your self-awareness, you understand reality better, and therefore, tend to be more giving. Azim has sometimes found himself doing things that are contrary to his teaching, but his journal writing allows him to catch himself in the act and practice self-correction. Otherwise he would be living an illusion, believing that he practices everything he preaches. Self-awareness comes from asking and answering hard questions that require deep personal integrity.

Living and working on purpose allows you to see beyond present reality to a place where you want to be. You are able to remain focussed on your big goals and not let petty things sidetrack you. You feel happy and productive. Purpose is the key to finding your way in the universal puzzle and reaching your destiny.

“The secret to success is consistency of purpose,” said Benjamin Disraeli, the 19^th century British prime minister.

As with so many things, Disraeli was right.

Adapted with permission from Life Balance the Sufi Way by Azim Jamal and Nido Qubein. Published by Jaico

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Who is a true leader? Is s/he someone who has an influence over multitudes?

Robin Sharma: Everyone has the opportunity to lead each day. Leadership isn’t about your job title, the size of your pay cheque or your office. It’s about your attitude. About your devotion to excel at everything you do. It’s about being inspirational and leaving people better than when you found them. About pushing the envelope, living your potential, being an example of possibility and doing your part to be a better human being. That to me is a true leader.

The greatest leader that I’ve ever met was Desmond Tutu. We recently met in South Africa, and just by being around the man you could feel “inspiration” and “leadership” oozing out of him. He has been an inspiration to millions, and is certainly one to me.

What is true greatness? And how can each one of us become great?

Robin Sharma: Greatness begins with a simple decision: to be great in everything you do. To lead by example. To inspire people you meet. To take risks and to create a great life. Because the greatest risk in life is to live without a risk.

Above all else, leadership and greatness are about making a difference and having an impact. Life is very short and before we know it, we will all be dust. What will really matter at the end of our lives is the kind of people we have become and the difference that we have made. Greatness is about leaving a legacy. Success is important but significance is more important.

My father once said, “Robin, when you were born you cried while the world rejoiced. Live your life in such a way that when you die, the world cries when you rejoice.”

Leaders are often both spontaneous and efficient. Which is more important?

Robin Sharma: Efficiency and spontaneity are quite opposed to one another. Efficiency is all about getting things done quickly in a more or less orderly manner—reducing costs, time, and resources. On the other hand, spontaneity is about acting on a whim, creativity, and responding to your subconscious.

Without efficiency, a lot would not get done in an organisation or in one’s life. Without spontaneity, life might appear to be dull and the creative engine of the arts, literature, business, etc. would lose momentum. Like everything else in life, here too, striking a balance is crucial.

Why be great? Is leading an ordinary life not fulfilling?

Robin Sharma: Because we all have the ability to live a happier, healthier and more fulfilling life. I have been spreading my message for over 10 years and have seen many people from different walks of life profoundly improve their lives. This gives me the confidence to share that ordinary people truly can create extraordinary lives. And it all starts with small daily steps. These small daily steps create striking results over time.

A lot of us want to change for the better but don’t know how to begin.

A lack of change, or being stagnant in life, is often because people are scared to face fears and try new things. Facing your fears, taking that proverbial leap off the cliff is the first step. Whether it be a fear of public speaking, or writing that novel you always thought you could—confrontation with that fear is the only solution. Change starts with action, not inaction.

What is your philosophy for happiness?

Robin Sharma: Happiness is being in the process of creating what’s most important to you in all significant areas of your life [including work, home and personal]. Happiness is not about reaching the destination, but about enjoying the process of getting to your own personal mountaintop. Happiness is also about being true to yourself and living life on your own terms rather than according to the values and dreams of others.

How important is health, according to you, in the pursuit of greatness?

A healthy mind always starts from a healthy body. In the break of one of my seminars, a gentleman came up to me and slipped me a piece of paper. It said: “Health is the crown on the ill person’s head that only a well person can see.” Health is wealth and without it, we have nothing.

Any tips for our readers?

Robin Sharma: On most days, I get up between 4 and 5 o’clock and take an hour for myself. I call this my holy hour. In that time, I plan my day, read, write my journal and reflect on what I want to stand for during the hours that will come. I have elaborated on this technique in my book, The Greatness Guide and it has helped many to become world-class. It’s a technique anyone can follow.

This was first published in the January 2009 issue of Complete Wellbeing.

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