We are overwhelming ourselves at the moment. We have been convinced for a long time that more is better. And I certainly applaud the effort that is being made to help people get it under control. But the truth is I have yet to see an article that deals with the root cause, which is two-fold.

Stop hoarding!

As long as we keep bringing in and getting more stuff, feeling like our value is in things, the clutter and the feeling of being overwhelmed will never go away.

Consumption has become the American way. It defines us. And, as an American, I see how my country has bullied the world into the same insanity. America needs to change this image for it is in an identity crisis. Not only does our obsession with possession cause us stress and confusion, overwhelm us and take our time, money and energy, it is also the cause of the depletion of our natural resources. It’s all connected.

We are overwhelming ourselves at the moment. We have been convinced for a long time that more is better

A few years ago I helped lead a spiritual tour to India and now a piece of my heart will forever beat there. I experienced both, the profound poverty and newfound affluence, a shocking juxtaposition. I also experienced what I think of as the ‘soul’ of India. It is a kind of humble simplicity, a purity of heart. The ancient wisdom of the Vedas still moves through and affects daily life. Meditating on the shores of the river Ganges at sunrise is a favourite memory of mine that I constantly go back to. Watching the yogis practice in the golden light, listening to the recognisable chanting and the ecstatic shouts from those who joined in, plays over and over again in my mind like a favourite song.

It is my heartfelt prayer that abundance continues to come to India for there is great need there too. However, the insane truth is that we in America need what India has as much as India needs what we have. Maybe we can meet each other in between.

Do you really ‘need’ that?

The root cause of all the clutter is a poverty of the soul. We keep thinking, here in America, that we can buy our happiness. That we can buy our children’s love. That with enough money, and the stuff it buys, we can fix anything. Well, we’ve tried that. We’ve beat that idea all to heck and it hasn’t worked. I believe we are starting to come full circle though. Yoga and meditation is becoming more popular every day. But it can’t happen soon enough. We must slow down and breathe. We must find our essence once again.

While in India, I learned a very painful and profound lesson. I did not consider myself a greedy person. I don’t think many of us do. However, my definition of greedy has changed. I now define greed as what is seen anytime someone has way more than what they actually need, and yet they still use the word ‘need’ regularly when referring to things like clothes, pizza, sunglasses, cars, art, electronics, and so on. This use of the word ‘need’ has no relationship to the actual definition of the word. When I use the word in this way, then I have become greedy in my neediness. I call it ‘needy greedy’!

There is another word I have often misused which is similar to need: starve. When I say ‘I’m starving’ when referring to food, it’s like saying ‘I need’ when referring to a pair of pants when there’s a closet full at home.

The root cause of all the clutter is a poverty of the soul. We keep thinking, here in America, that we can buy our happiness

Moment of truth

While co-facilitating the spiritual pilgrimage to India, it was actually on the way to the river Ganges where my mind was forever altered. There was a thick fog as we wandered through the dirt roads and skinny alleyways in the old city of Varanasi. As the sun pushed through, it appeared that the fog itself was emitting a golden light from within. This light reflected off the old walls and temples that make up much of the cities in India. The only sound was that of our footsteps on dirt as we meandered toward the river.

There were 40 or so of us tourists wearing fanny packs, sneakers and sunblock. I hadn’t had much to eat for several days because, when in India, I discovered, you eat pretty much the same food every day. And I, unfortunately, was no longer feeling very grateful for my meals. I had even skipped breakfast that morning. As we neared the ‘Mother Ganga’, I thought several times to myself, I’m starving! I had said this more than once out loud over the last few days.

Then many yards in front of me, from out of the golden light, a person came into view pushing an old wheelbarrow. The dark shadow, silhouetted by the sunlight behind it, looked like a skeletal hanger whose ragged clothes were draped over it. There was something in the wheelbarrow, but I couldn’t make it out, maybe it was wood for one of the many cremation ceremonies.

Whatever it was, we were headed right for one another. I wanted to change trajectory, but my efforts were thwarted by something bigger than my own will. Just a few feet away from the wheelbarrow now, I strained to see what its contents were. As I glanced downward, it moved. A man, who looked older than life itself, struggled to lift his head and open his eyes. He was starving to death, with less skin and bones than the emaciated person pushing him. As we passed, just inches from each other, our eyes met. I saw pain, pleading and death in his eyes. Suddenly, a pang of hunger entered me that was so powerful it sucked the life force right out of my body. I felt faint and dizzy as my eyes glazed over, accompanied by a humming in my ears. I staggered over and took five steps while my left hand reached for the nearest wall to lean on. “What’s happening to me?” I thought, “God help me.”

And I believe God had done just that, but not in any way I could have known at the time. For a moment, I was starving. This is one of the greatest gifts I have ever received. Then, as soon as it came, it was gone. Simple hunger once again. Since that day I do not say “I’m starving” or “I need”. To say so is untrue. When I feel those words coming, I replace them with the truth: “I’m hungry” or “I would like”. This changes me. Then I take a moment for self-inquiry. I try to understand what my motivation is behind the “wanting”. Half the time, the truth is I don’t really want anything. I say a quick prayer for the millions of those on the planet who are actually in need and truly starving.

The gift I received from the man in the wheelbarrow that day was, maybe, the most precious gift of all—compassion. Through it, we can heal ourselves and that’s the start to healing the world.

Do not purchase or accept anything into your life unless you are sure it supports your “soul”. All the rest must go!

A time for reflection

When we say “I’m starving” or “I need”, we are giving a powerful message to our subconscious mind. The subconscious does not discern between exaggeration and truth. It takes what we think and say at face value and manifests it into our life as it sees it, taking great liberties with interpretation. “Starving” and “need” denote lack. They point to the experience of desperation, emptiness, drama, and loss. One way or another, to the degree that we say and think such things, they will play themselves out in our lives in its many and various disguises.

So, step one: Stop bringing stuff in! Do not purchase or accept anything into your life unless you are sure it supports your “soul”. All the rest must go!

And step two: You are perfect and whole, just as you are. A miracle to behold. There isn’t anything “out there” that is needed to complete you. Don’t fall for that trap as countless millions of us in America have. It truly has led to our suffering.

And so, my friends in the mystical and rapidly-changing land of India, it is my prayer that we examine the directions our lives are taking and meet somewhere in the middle. Namasté.

The post Consumerism: What do you really need? appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

• Act One: We were in paradise, nirvana, Shangri-La, bliss.
• Act Two: We got complacent and lazy. We took paradise for granted. We forgot we were there! This forgetfulness led to temptation.
• Act Three: We were kicked out of paradise.

So, what in the name of heaven does this have to do with clutter?

Everything.

Paradise or Shangri-La is a metaphor for a pure state of consciousness or clarity of mind. It is not a physical place. Therefore, when we were ‘kicked out’ we didn’t actually go anywhere. The joke is on us—we’re still in paradise, we just forgot. And now, from the moment we were ‘kicked out’ we have been looking ‘out there,’ in stuff, somewhere else, for that peace of mind, that bliss, that joy we lost. We think it will be in the next ‘thing’ we purchase or acquire. This is what puts us on the perpetual treadmill leading to… clutter!

Paradise or Shangri-La is a metaphor for a pure state of consciousness or clarity of mind

So, who would have thought that letting go, releasing, mastering the art of subtraction, would be today’s highest spiritual practice? As we clear the clutter from our lives, we create clarity of mind. There is a direct connection. As we create clarity of mind, we return to our original self. Slowly but surely, we begin to feel a greater sense of peace and joy. A feeling begins to rise up inside of us: I remember this place! Why, it’s Paradise. Right where I am.

Clutter, of course, is not just physical things. It’s anything in your life that causes confusion, stress, overwhelm. I call all of it ‘Chotchky’, which is an ancient Yiddish term that points to anything that takes our mind off our soul. For example, one form of mind Chotchky or ‘Mindotchky’ is the excessive amount of useless information cluttering up our very thoughts.

So, where does one begin to de-clutter?

I have found that almost everyone has a place that is pulling at his or her soul, whispering, “here, over here.” It may be your closet, store-room, garage, trunk, office, or even a drawer.

Go to that place and say in your heart “I am letting go, to remember my soul.” And then begin.

There are four categories

1. Keep
2. Give away
3. Recycle
4. Throw away

Whenever you are unsure, give it the Chotchky test. Hold it in your hand and ask your highest self, “Do I really love this, or does it truly support my life’s purpose?” If the answer is no, let it go. If the answer is ‘may be’, let it go. ‘May be’ comes form the ego mind, trapped in the old fear thought of “this thing might be it, the missing piece in my life.”

As we clear the clutter from our lives, we create clarity of mind. There is a direct connection

What the ego is incapable of comprehending is that the missing piece can’t be seen. What is missing in our lives is emptiness. Our soul wants more ‘nothing’. It is in the emptiness, which allows spaciousness, that we actually find the missing piece.

I will never forget the day my younger son, CJ, thought he found what was missing. It was Christmas 2002. He was interested in only one present. The one in the Big Box [some things never change].

When we finally gave him the green light to open it, he ripped the paper, tossing it in the air. Feeling his energy, the dog joined in, running and barking around the box as the scraps of paper floated down. Soon, there was nothing between him and the Holy Grail but the box itself. Finally, he slowly pulled back the cardboard flaps as if it was some ancient archaeological find. You could almost hear rusty hinges creak. He was now Indiana Jones. However, when he finally fully pulled the ‘doors’ open, revealing the contents of the Big Box, no mystical light came shooting out. The ground did not shake. People’s faces didn’t even melt.

Clutter is not just physical things. It’s anything in your life that causes confusion, stress, overwhelm

Several of us simply asked, “What is it?!” After staring into the box, frozen, stunned, CJ raised his head toward his mother and me. He seemed to be looking right through us though, as if we were rice paper, the words in his mind trying to find their rightful order. He looked at my father and mother, his grandparents, the ones who brought the contents of the Big Box. Then, through clenched teeth, with beady eyes and his face a shade of red I have not seen before nor since, the words came with a fury:

“It’s just what I always never wanted in my whole life!”

Stunning. How can anything reach such a status? How could anyone be consciously aware of the one thing—out of everything in the world—that you would never want? May be instead of creating a wish list each gift-giving holiday, one could thoughtfully craft a hate list, in order from the most dreaded to the least despised.

My afterthoughts about his comment

Ultimately, I think, those words that CJ uttered were his attempt at expressing something that cannot really fit into any earthly language. Maybe something closer to speaking in tongues, it is something we have all felt and continue to feel with some regularity but have never attempted to convey. This elusive something references the futility inherent in trying to find our soul, even God, in something, somewhere, out there. At age four, he had just experienced, possibly for the first time, projectionotchky: the projection of one’s own natural state of joy and peace onto the world of things.

Nothing in the world, no matter how big the box, could ever contain the miracle that lies within us. It is the tale as old as time.

In the throes of projectionotchky, no matter where we go, there it is not.

What is meant to be always finds a way

A few hours later, CJ went up to the playroom. There it sat: the thing from the Big Box. Lifeless. Alone. It was a puppet theatre with a marionette, not too dissimilar from Pinocchio. [“I want to be a real boy.”]

And like Pinocchio, something began to change. Not the thing, of course. Things don’t change. Something inside the real boy.

He began to play with it and to create characters. A whole world was given birth; it was a real love story. Now my son was living in the truth that all he ever really wanted, he always had. Returning to this truth, the contents of the Big Box were transformed into something joyful, simply matching his state of being. You see, the thing is neutral. All things are. They simply exist to reflect back to us our projections in the form of our thoughts.

What is missing in our lives is emptiness. Our soul wants more ‘nothing’.

CJ soon came to Heather and me in a way that I can only describe as meek. He was humble, peaceful, loving and true.

In this way, he said, “Daddy, can I call Grandma and Grandpa? I want to tell them something.”

“Sure,” I replied. “What do you want to tell them?”

“It’s special, Daddy. A surprise.”

He picked up the phone, which looked quite large in his four-year-old hands, and, as I fed him the numbers, he dialled. “Grandma,” he said, “I have something to tell you and Grandpa, too.”

My father got on another line. CJ continued, “Grandma, Grandpa, I’m so sorry. It’s my favourite! I didn’t mean what I said. I love you.”

Nothing in the world, no matter how big the box, could ever contain the miracle that lies within us

He enjoyed the puppet theatre on and off for three years, which is quite exceptional. Most Christmas gifts turn into Chotchky within days, if not hours. Many are Chotchky even before the unwrapping. [God help us!]

Recently, we finally gave it to another child to enjoy. It is very powerful to know when something has made that transition from being useful, enjoyable, and life-enhancing to becoming clutter. The sooner we recognise this, the sooner we are free to release, let go, and make room for something better. And the clearer our mind becomes, the better we are at recognising that something better is often . . . nothing at all.

And so paradise is right there. All around. It’s just hard to see under all the clutter. Begin clearing, and find the missing peace.

The post Banishing clutter: The wisdom of living with less appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.