Here are some of the things patients hate about doctors, and with good reason. If you encounter these repeatedly, maybe it’s time for you to look for another (better!) doctor.

Signs of an unprofessional doctor

1. Makes you wait endlessly: If your doctor routinely makes you wait and that too, for no rhyme or reason, this reflects either poor time management on the part of the doctor or a disregard for the patient’s time. Unfortunately, many doctors seem to take a kind of perverse pride in making their patients wait. It’s true that patients need to be patient, but not in a doctor’s “waiting” room.
2. Does not give sufficient explanations: Doctors are used to having their orders being followed, so they just tell their patients what to do, without explaining what or why.
3. Doesn’t discuss options: Many doctors are authoritarian, and expect blind obedience from their patients. They refuse to consider alternatives, let alone discuss them.
4. Behaves rudely: Doctors like to project how busy they are and how valuable their time is, so they are often rude and inconsiderate. Their ability to keep patients “in their place” lends them a false sense of importance.
5. Does not reveal or explain consulting/treatment costs: Most patients are reasonable and expect to pay for medical services—they just need to know how much the cost is, so they can budget for it. But there are doctors who think it is below their dignity to talk about crass matters such as money; others use this as an excuse to extract every last penny they can from their patients.
6. Does not respect the privacy of the patient: It is the right of every patient to expect undivided attention from their doctor, at least for a few minutes. But they often fail to get even this because there are doctors who talk to two or three patients at once. Such doctors believe in multitasking in order to improve their efficiency and their “patient through-put”.
7. Never listens to the patient: Many doctors feel they “know-it-all” and do not even bother to listen to the patient’s perspective or feelings. They may dismiss what the patient says or cut short the patient when they are speaking. Patients feel cheated when they cannot unburden themselves.
8. When the chemistry is not right: I received an email from a patient, who said, “I drive my current doctor crazy. I question everything and I just can’t follow orders until I actually agree to follow them.” That’s a good idea! Many doctors prefer passive patients who agree to do what they are told to. Unfortunately, what they don’t realise is that these silent passive patients are often the ones who don’t “follow orders”. Indeed, they are the ones who are non-compliant. While it is true that it does take longer to talk to active, questioning patients, they are the ones who are much more co-operative and compliant, once they agree with the treatment plan, because they have played an active part in its formulation.

Many senior doctors continue with these bad habits, partly because they can get away with this behaviour, and partly because they don’t know any better. Unless patients learn to speak up for their rights, the doctor-patient relationship will always be lopsided against the patient.

Get off your knees

I can understand why poor,  patients put up with such behaviour. Beggars can’t be choosers, and they are so grateful for any care they receive at government hospitals, that they don’t expect any better. But why do affording patients, who pay large fees to their doctors in posh hospitals, tolerate such rudeness? Unless patients learn to get off their knees, doctors will remain comfortably ensconced on their pedestals.

Patients are unnecessarily scared of changing doctors. They feel that their doctor will be “hurt”; or that “he knows my case” and therefore they should stick to him. Sometimes, a fresh re-assessment makes a world of a difference. I often see patients who have received poor quality medical care. When I ask them why their doctor did a particular procedure (which was unnecessary), they look nonplussed, and the standard answer is: ”Because the doctor told me to.” When I enquire why they didn’t check to see if the doctor’s advise was correct, their stock reply is: “But I had faith in my doctor .”

Don’t trust blindly

Yes, it is important to have faith in your doctor, and to trust him. But you need to be careful in whom you repose your faith. If you find a good doctor, your faith will be amply rewarded. Unfortunately, patients are often not always good at discerning good doctors from and bad ones, and their blind faith can prove to be expensive. This is why it’s a good idea to do your homework before going to your doctor and also to verify everything he tells you independently. Doing your “due diligence” will pay off handsomely.

You have a lot more at stake than just money or time when you go through any medical treatment. It’s important for you to choose a doctor you feel comfortable with, so you have peace of mind that you did your best, no matter what the final outcome. If you aren’t happy with your present doctor, it’s time to look for alternatives. Everyone is allowed to make a mistake once, and you may have been unlucky with your initial selection. However, there’s no excuse for making the same mistake repeatedly. Learn from your mistakes and act now, rather than suffering in silence, and regretting later.

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Let’s take a look at some common myths.

Myth 1: Pregnancy care starts after you get pregnant

Most women register with their obstetrician for medical care after they get pregnant. In reality, the best time to start taking care of your unborn baby is before you conceive. Such care is called pre-pregnancy or pre-conception care. The beauty about pre-pregnancy care is that it is so simple: it only involves visiting your doctor before you are planning to get pregnant, rather than after you’ve missed your menstrual period.

The doctor:

1. takes a medical history
2. carries out a physical examination
3. performs some simple laboratory tests.

These procedures are inexpensive, easy to conduct and signify examples of preventive medicine at its best.

Pre-pregnancy care also has other benefits. For instance, it allows the doctor to identify problems and rectify them at an early stage. If these problems are spotted after you become pregnant, the presence of the delicate embryo can delay detailed testing. A simple precaution you can take is to ensure a regular intake of a vitamin called folic acid that greatly reduces the chances of your baby being born with birth defects. It should be taken before you become pregnant and during the first six weeks of pregnancy.

Myth 2: Modern medical care is essential if you want to have a healthy baby

Modern obstetric care can ensure safe pregnancy and childbirth. Unfortunately, doctors have ‘medicalised’ pregnancy to such an extent that an otherwise normal event has been converted to one which needs rigorous and frequent medical assistance. Common tests which are misused include: blood tests for TORCH infections [TORCH is an acronym for a special group of infections that may be acquired by a woman during pregnancy]; ultrasound scans; and foetal monitoring.

Another area of misuse relates to the tests available for screening the baby for a possible birth defect. Many doctors routinely subject their patients to a ‘triple test’ during pregnancy to screen for birth defects. Some of these tests can be expensive, and risky as well. Thus, it is not uncommon for a mother to lose a healthy baby because of a test which was not really required in the first place.

Myth 3: More is better

A lot of medical technology during pregnancy is overused and misused. Foetal monitoring to document foetal wellbeing is a good example. While this procedure was initially designed to serve as a tool to monitor the wellbeing of the foetus and help reduce the need for medical intervention, today it is often used to justify an LSCS [Caesarean section] in order to forcibly take out a baby ‘in foetal distress’.

A much simpler alternative would be to opt for ‘kick counts’ in which the mother acts as her own foetal monitor, by counting how many times her baby moves. A baby who moves actively is sure to be healthy.

Myth 4: Hospitals are best places to deliver a baby

Despite advances in medical science, it is sad that the rituals associated with childbirth in hospitals have unfortunately been designed for the doctor’s convenience, rather than the patients’. Harmful practises include: forced induction of labour; routine use of enemas and intravenous drips, foetal monitoring, making the patient lie down [rather than allowing her to walk about]—it’s a long list.

Don’t let the hospital/clinic staff patronise you—you need to assert your rights. The presence of a doula [a person trained to provide support to women in labour] has been proven to be very helpful. Also, you should encourage your husband to participate in this adventure as actively as possible.

Recent developments show that many women in the West are turning back to natural childbirth once again, often either at home or what are known as ‘birthing centres’. In other words, they would like to keep as far away from a hospital as possible. Despite the fact many doctors scare women into believing that the hospital is the safest place to deliver a baby, recent international studies have shown that the home is often much safer and much more congenial for normal births.

For example, Holland, where over 60 per cent of births occur at home, under the supervision of midwives, can justifiably boast of having one of the world’s lowest neonatal mortality rates.

Myth 5: Mothers need anaesthesia to cope with the pain of labour and childbirth

Yet another myth that has become a norm is the application of anaesthesia for pain relief. Epidural analgesia has become a status symbol in most hospitals. We have mindlessly aped this Western ‘advance’, much to the detriment of both the mother and the child. Pain relief techniques should be used only when absolutely necessary. Otherwise simple techniques such as yoga and meditation can help you manage labour pain effectively.

Myth 6: A caesarean section [CS] is safer for the baby than normal vaginal birth

We are witnessing a virtual epidemic of caesarean sections today. Whereas a CS once used to be the method of last resort to deliver the baby, it has now become the norm in some hospitals, accounting for 50 per cent of all births. The reason, of course, is obvious: a CS is financially much more lucrative to the doctor than a normal delivery. As a senior obstetrician wryly put it: “The only indication for a normal delivery today seems to be if a patient delivers before the doctor reaches the hospital.”

Myth 7: It’s not safe to have sex during pregnancy, as this can hurt the baby

This is not true. The baby is safe inside its own private swimming pool in the uterus, and sex will not affect it. In fact, many women find that their libido increases dramatically during the first few weeks of pregnancy, and it’s safe to have sex if you so desire.

Myth 8: It’s not safe for pregnant women to fly

Modern aircraft cabins are pressurised, which means that it’s safe for women to fly in the first 32 weeks of their pregnancy. After this time, most airlines will not allow you to fly, because they are worried you may go into labour in the plane.

Myth 9: You can tell your baby’s gender by the way you are carrying

How you carry your baby depends upon many variables, including your build; the baby’s size; and whether the baby’s head has entered the pelvis or not. This has nothing to do with the baby’s gender—but you always have a 50 per cent chance of being right.

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