What is the impact of such media reports on young minds?

In India, the I&B Ministry hasn’t laid down laws regarding responsible media portrayal of sensitive issues. Unfortunately this encourages the media and uninformed viewers to promote and share shocking content in the guise of “spreading awareness”. But the effect is unfortunately the opposite; it creates a suicide contagion. The teen population is particularly vulnerable. A 2017 WHO report titled “Mental Health Status of Adolescents in South-East Asia” found that 25 per cent of Indian students admit to feeling depressed. This is further backed by reports from the Global Burden of Disease Study 2013 where suicide was reported as the biggest killer of 15- to 24-year-olds in India. And most recently, a report released by the Health Ministry titled “India: Health of the Nation’s States 2017” found that the leading reasons for injury burden among the youth is suicide and self-harm. This makes teens and young adults a high-risk population for suicide.

To recognise why we need to be responsible reporters of shocking news, especially for the youth, let’s understand the teenage brain. Nicola Morgan, the author of Blame My Brain, says that in teenagers, the part of the brain which seems to be working overtime is the amygdala, a tiny almond shaped structure in our emotional [limbic] brain, linked to gut reaction and raw emotion. At the same time, the pre-frontal cortex—the part of our brain that allows us to calm ourselves down, make rational decisions, and think logically—has not yet fully developed.

The theory goes that our neurons [brain cells] are insulated by a fatty substance called myelin, which is essential for controlled and healthy functioning of our nervous system. The process of insulation starts from the lowest parts of our brain and the last area to be myelinated, well into adulthood, is our pre-frontal cortex. Since the process of myelination has not been completed in teen brains, this explains the knee-jerk reactions and “motor-mouth” talk we associate so well with teenagers. Therefore, we need to be extra careful around young minds as they are unable to think completely logically; they can’t differentiate reality from their inner world nor judge consequences well. More importantly, the underdeveloped teenage brain makes this age group most vulnerable to depression and impulsive acts. That’s why when people argue that they share videos to make teens aware of such cases, my response is that this is counter-productive and can, in fact, add to the problem. The evidence is that in the days following this suicide case and the sharing of that video, the average number of calls I receive from troubled teens multiplied; many of them expressed that they were having suicidal thoughts.

The same “suicide contagion effect” was observed just after the Netflix series 13 Reasons Why was released. Soon after the series was released, there was an increase in Google searches for ‘how to commit suicide’ and ‘teen suicide’.

Here are some things we can do as a society to prevent teen suicides

Post responsibly

Any information received about suicide, self-harm, depression needs to be verified before being posted on social media or broadcasted on WhatsApp. Avoid forwarding videos and images about graphic portrayals of celebrity suicides or other types of deaths. There is no need to view or share those details.

Establish safety

If you teen shows signs of depression then take measures to keep the environment safe. Remove sharp objects and dangerous ingestible substances. Keep a watch on your teen’s outings and store contacts details of their friends. Request them that you will periodically check their phones [in their presence]. Install content-control software to ensure your teen is not being exposed to age-inappropriate content on the web. Educate them about general safety and cyber safety.

Be a moderator, not a helicopter

Despite the safety you may try to establish, reality is that your child may be exposed to graphic portrays of self-harm and suicide [the blue whale challenge, TV series such as “13 reasons why”, social media material]. Out of anxiety, parents end up helicoptering teens which causes more resentment and secretiveness. A balanced approach is to communicate about their feelings regarding these experiences. Ask how it impacts them and assure them you are with them no matter what.

Monitor physical health

Take your teen for regular health check-ups to test for deficiencies in vitamins D3 and B12 as low levels of these usually masquerade as depression. Ensure that the child is not eating too many sugary foods as these can cause a sugar-rush followed by a sudden drop in energy, creating a cycle of “high-low” moods. Studies show that morning hunger is strongly linked to depression so ensure that your teen does not leave home on an empty stomach. Physical exercise is a must to reduce low moods. As per the WHO, even 10 minutes of aerobic exercise is sufficient for good health.

Insist on good sleep

One major study has shown that sleep-deprived people are 40 times more likely to suffer from clinical depression. Research shows that teens need more than nine hours of sleep. Lesser sleep builds up a sleep debt and makes the teen lose out on REM [Rapid Eye Movement] sleep, which is important for memory and learning.

Be informed and communicate

Read up on teenage years [those that talk about the teen brain are often very informative]. It will help create a sense of empathy about what teens are going through and reduce your frustration as a parent. Keep your communication channels open and encourage your teen to share. Don’t judge their secrecy; it’s a part of growing up and creating their space. When teens feel comfortable, they share what is on their mind. Demonstrate rational thinking and controlled behaviour, as these will be models for your teen to replicate as they step into adulthood.

Seek professional help

Often only a mental health professional [psychiatrist/psychologist] can correctly diagnose if the teenager is depressed. Such professionals will run tests and interview the child to differentiate transient mood swings from depression. Trust the expert to provide professional help and work with them to help your child attain good mental health. 

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1. Listen to your teenager

The best thing you can give your teenager is your time. Aim for a minimum of 30 minutes of quality time per day. If you cannot give her your attention when she wants it, set aside a time for her later in the day and keep your appointment. When you listen well, you will be more likely to identify illogical thoughts, generalisations and potentially dangerous decisions your teen may be contemplating. Stop your internal chatter and keep your mind completely on her words. By listening to your teenager, you will create opportunities for giving advice and improving your relationship.

2. Praise your teenager often

You have the ability to ‘make or break’ your teenager, simply by how you treat him. When a teenager is praised often, he is more likely to experience high self-esteem, which is a foundation of self-confidence, increased motivation, better decision-making, improved relationships and self-respect. Poor self-esteem often leads to self-criticism, doubt and confusion about one’s abilities and life. By seeking opportunities to praise your teenager, you are actively improving his self-perception. The importance of praising your teenager cannot be overstated.

3. Accept your teenager

Encourage your teenager to be independent by allowing her to make decisions in areas such as sporting interests, hobbies and clothing styles. By allowing her personal freedom, you are increasing her confidence. [Decisions regarding schooling and general safety are best left to parents.] Avoid being the co-dependent parent, who lives ‘through their child’, obsessing about your teen’s obstacles and successes like they were your own. It is not realistic to expect your teenager to always conform to your expectations. She is more likely to succeed in life when she is being herself, following her own path—so encourage her to be autonomous.

By listening to your teenager, you will create opportunities for giving advice and improving your relationship

4. Educate your teenager

Research tells us that the male human’s brain is not fully developed for processing danger until he is approximately 24 years old, so in many ways, you are the voice of reason. Keep talking to your teenager about key areas like drugs, alcohol and sex. Try not to overreact if he comes home from a party where alcohol or drugs were taken. If you ban him from parties forever, he may avoid discussing his concerns with you again. Be calm, and ask him about the drugs or if he consumed alcohol and then educate him on the dangers these substances. One of your primary roles is being the positive influence, so it is vital that your teenager feels comfortable talking with you about anything.

5. Understand your teenager’s world

Teenagers often live with fears and challenges that may be different from your own. They feel great pressure to be accepted by their peers, making them highly susceptible to outside influences, which impacts their decisions and priorities. This focus on friends causes some parents to feel pushed aside. Teenagers are challenged physically and emotionally: their bodies are busy supporting dramatic growth spurts, while their minds are trying to cope with hormone-fuelled moods. To make matters worse, many teenagers are exposed to negativity and trolling on social media and other websites that make them feel helpless and overwhelmed. Add to this the pressure felt by many teenagers to meet their parents’ or teachers’ expectations. To escape, or experiment, some teenagers try drugs or alcohol, further complicating their lives. You can make your teenager’s life easier by getting to know, and understanding, his or her struggles.

One of your primary roles is being the positive influence, so it is vital that your teenager feels comfortable talking with you about anything

6. Don’t alienate your teenager

Your relationship with your teen is the benchmark for all her future relationships, so ensure that this relationship is based on mutual respect. You need to trust her, but this trust must be developed. If your teenager tells you that she is going out, let her know that she needs to call or text you, if plans change. If she does not make contact, consequences need to be enforced. Avoid resorting to unconstructive criticism, name-calling, yelling, swearing, giving the silent treatment, trying to dominate or making irrational threats that you never carry out. Such tactics will only result in drama and unhappiness, and will fuel her rebellious streak. Create an environment for your teenager that includes love, respect, healthy boundaries, and consequences, for their safety, wellbeing and for the benefit of the household.

7. Watch over your teenager

Your teenager may no longer want to socialise with you, and instead may spend hours alone with his cell phone or on the computer in his bedroom. While teenagers need their space, watch out for any abnormal changes. If your teenager avoids any conversation with you, or her sleep patterns or eating habits change, or she seems socially withdrawn, then seek professional help with a counsellor or psychologist. Your child is at a vulnerable age where depression, anxiety, and self-destructive behaviour tend to develop. Educate yourself on the signs of distress and watch over your teenager closely.

If you are feeling left out and frustrated by your teenager, take a step back and consider how fragile teenage years are. Your teenager may feel uncertain about her future, as she tries to discover who she is and what she wants from life. She will benefit greatly from your time, friendship, acceptance, support and love. Your teenager is a soul given to you on loan. Your role is to educate, praise, love, and get to know your teenager’s world. The way you treat her today will impact her future for better or worse.

This was first published in the February 2016 issue of Complete Wellbeing.

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