Comments on: How to Live with a Perfectionist Partner: Advice From Experts

By: Sharon

Sharon — Wed, 12 Feb 2025 14:29:06 +0000

In reply to joanne. Run, run as fast as you can. Sounds like he is a narcissist as well as a perfectionist. We women always think our love for them will “fix” all problems. It doesn’t. Having been in your position, I can say with absolute certainty, your relationship will not be a happy one. Why even consider entering a long term relationship with this happening. Get out while you can.?!

By: SusanStyles

SusanStyles — Mon, 19 Aug 2024 10:25:18 +0000

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By: Megha

Megha — Wed, 30 Nov 2016 12:01:52 +0000

I think my husband too is a perfectionist… Its been one and half years of marriage and things have just worsened. His sense of insecurity and lack of self confidence due to his own nature was understood but my relationship with him worsened with constant interference of my mother in law and brother in law. I don’t know what to do I feel lost.

By: Jean Withers

Jean Withers — Sun, 16 Oct 2016 11:39:42 +0000

Absolute nonsense, perfectionists do not change. It is a deep seated lifelong condition. The troube is, a true perfectionist is absolute in the fact that he / she is right and unless there is an element of humility, they will not see the need to change. It is always everyone else. A lovely positive article offering hope but nonetheless, nonsense. Perfectionists are toxic people and my advice would be either to go their way and effectively be controlled or stay clear. I have vbeen married to one for 15 years!!

By: Mark Whitley

Mark Whitley — Thu, 21 Jan 2016 15:30:12 +0000

My my wife and I have been married for 5 years. She is a perfectionist. My wife suffers from uncontrollable perfectionism. We are both on our second marriage. In my mind when we got married me marrying a perfectionist would probably be a good staying scenes out I am A non perfectionist. However I feel as if I am getting beatdown buy a perfectionist. These articles are making it more tolerable, I now can see how she sees things and try to point out some of the professional ideas to help us work this life together. Note to new people getting married if she is a perfectionist be prepared, it will take everything you have to live a happy life, but if you love her it’s worth it

By: Johanna

Johanna — Fri, 19 Jun 2015 19:54:24 +0000

After 20 years with my perfect husband I realize, now that we both are retired and home with each other all day, everyday — that he is going to drive me CRAZY with his perfectionism.

Thank God I am old enough to know what he is doing is sad and more about him than me. I just gotta keep finding answers that help me get through each day of criticism. After all, while I am certainly a loser ( 🙂 ) , he is a pretty good –almost “perfect” husband.

I love him so much and more disappointed in him than he could ever be in me.

By: Vandana

Vandana — Mon, 27 Apr 2015 23:51:09 +0000

My husband OF 35 years le has always lived by his standards to meet his goals. The upside? He is a hard worker and smart at that, he is valuable to his department and bosses. But he is so sure of himself and so short on time that he does not let me have a say in anything. He has virtually silence me by being dismissive and undermining my point of view. I feel like I have no respect in the relationship. But then he turns around and says you have no respect for yourself, that I want to pick a fight when there is no problem what-so-ever.
Some days I feel I will go crazy with sadness, self-doubt, and essentially, depression.

By: rebecca

rebecca — Sat, 05 Jul 2014 11:13:13 +0000

I have lost another baby due to an abnormality, its been a month, and i’ve been emotional, and my spouse said to me that my behaviour has been really bad for the past month. Not only has he been critical but also he keeps telling me that i need to improve more, i need to work more in the house and be “involved”. This time I really couldnt stand his perfectionism.

By: LEANNA

LEANNA — Sun, 10 Nov 2013 23:39:37 +0000

Cultivating a relationship with a perfectionist who is also a radiologist is exhausting. Living through comments from my partner such as: “I can’t be in a relationship with someone who does/says that” holds me hostage to threats that he will be gone if I don’t alter MY behavior. So fragile is he, that he said recently that he could “go over the edge at any given time”. Of course, setting unrealistic standards for yourself and all others does produce frigility. Can you imagine living each day knowing everyone will let you down with their imperfection? I will stay imperfect thank you. Sigh.

By: joanne

joanne — Sat, 21 Sep 2013 22:43:08 +0000

Thank you for this article, it is helping me know how to improve my relationship with my would be husband. Each time we argue, its always about something I’ve done. am always the one doing the mistakes. Nothing I do seems good enough. I stumbled upon this piece after a mentally draning arguement with him. I thank you again.