The workplace—whether you are a highway worker, an office assistant, a retail clerk, a senior manager or a limo driver—is stressful. Often times there aren’t enough hours in the day to do what’s required of you. The people you work with may be TDO’s [The Difficult Ones] and your boss may be a person who just really enjoys exerting power over others. So, what do you do? You probably can’t quit. Most people need their paycheck. Instead of physically leaving the job, consider mentally approaching the workplace in a different way. Become mindful in the workplace.

What’s mindfulness? According to the The Oxford Mindfulness Centre, “Mindfulness is an aid to enhancing human potential by combining modern science with ancient wisdom.”

In reaction to the stress at the workplace, our bodies change in a negative way. Mindfulness allows us to reset our bodies aiming to a more positive, productive outcome.

But, if you are a limo driver or retail worker, it might not be prudent to start a meditation in the middle of what you are doing just to begin to relieve the stress. Mindfulness in the workplace has to be practical and workable in whatever line of work you do.

Five steps towards greater mindfulness

There are five steps you can take to become more mindful in your daily work activities:

1. Knowing your triggers
2. Becoming aware of your surroundings
3. Listening to and changing your self-talk
4. Learning to breathe
5. Having a variety of tools you can use

Start by recognising what triggers you

Most people don’t know what sets them off and starts the downward stressful cycle. Something happens and you react—but what? Begin to pay attention to what gets you. When does your heart rate go up? When did your palms get clammy? When did you start to clench your teeth? Keep a journal if possible so throughout your day you can begin to note the things that trigger your negativity.

Become more aware of your surroundings and your physical state

Bring your attention back several times a day to how you are sitting, or standing. Focus on how you hold your body. Focus on the people around you and how positive, or negative they are. People move through their day largely unaware of their surroundings and their own physical state so pause several times throughout the day and just take stock of what’s happening. Once you recognise something that is painful or negative, resolve to drop it and move your attention to something more positive.

Watch your self-talk

Recognise the self-talk you give yourself as you react to things throughout the day. Once you know your triggers, and become aware of your surroundings you will probably hear the self-talk that starts up. “I hate my boss.” “This place is the worst.” “I’ll never get all of the things done that she is asking me to do.” “I wish I could win the lottery and give my notice.” The talk you engage in, inside of your own head, is often the most debilitating thing happening throughout the day. Your talk drags you down and keeps you down. Listen to what you are saying and choose to reframe. “Yes, this person I work for can be challenging but I can learn to deal with him/her.” “I am fortunate to be healthy and working and I’ll do the best job I can do each day.” “There is too much to do but I can only do one thing at a time, so let me focus on what’s in front of me.” Your self-talk doesn’t change your conditions, but it can normalise them and give you more strength to deal with them.

Next, learn to breathe

The most amazing thing about deep breathing and its ability to centre you and calm you, is that you can do it anywhere and at any time. Most people never learn to breathe properly and they take rapid breaths in the chest area. Imagine a deflated balloon in your stomach. When you breathe in, fill that balloon with healthy air, when you breathe out empty the balloon of all negativity. Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. The mind can’t focus on two things at once so bring your attention to your breath and the other stresses are diminished.

Lastly, build your toolbox

There are a number of things you can do to practise becoming more mindful: Chew your food slowly and thoughtfully; Take a moment before a meal to give thanks; drive your car at the speed limit; slow your walking pace down when you catch yourself rushing; count to 10 before you respond when speaking to someone; keep a smooth stone in your pocket to rub when you begin to experience stress.

The more you practice being mindful in the things you do each day, the easier it will be to be mindful in your workplace.

The post 5 steps to help you be mindful at your workplace appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

Relationship building is always the foundation of effective leadership. Leaders who ignore the relational aspect of leadership tend to rely on their position instead. Or they expect competence to do ‘all the talking’ for them. True, good leaders are competent, but they are also intentionally connected to the people they lead.

One of the best ways to stay connected to your people and keep track of how they’re doing is to approach the task informally as you move among the people. As you see people in the parking lot, chat with them. Go to meetings a few minutes early to see people, but don’t start in on the agenda until you’ve had time to catch up. And, as the title of this article suggests, take time to walk slowly through the halls. Connect with people and give them an opportunity to make contact with you.

When it comes to connecting informally, leaders in the middle of an organisation often have a distinct advantage over their leadership counterparts at the top. Leaders in the middle are viewed as more accessible than top leaders. They are perceived as having more time [even if it’s not true]. And they are seen as more approachable. Their people don’t worry about ‘bothering them’ and are less reluctant to take their time, unlike people who report directly to the top leader.

Walking slowly through the halls is a useful skill for leading down no matter where you are in an organisation, but the best time to master it is while you’re in the middle, not after you get to the top. To help you develop this skill successfully, here are a few suggestions.

Good leaders are intentionally connected to the people they lead

1. Slow down

To connect with people, you travel at their speed. When connecting with your leader, chances are you need to speed up. Though it is not always true, in general the higher you go in an organisation’s hierarchy, the faster the leaders travel. The leader at the top often has boundless energy and is very quick mentally.

Conversely, when you move down people move more slowly. Once again, not everyone will be slower, but in general it is true. People at the bottom don’t process information quickly, and they don’t make decisions as fast. Part of that is due to having less information. Some of it comes from having less experience.

Most people who want to lead are naturally fast. But if you want become a better leader, you actually need to slow down. You can move faster alone. You can garner more individual honours alone. But to lead others, you need to slow down enough to connect with them, engage them, and take them with you.

If you want become a better leader, you actually need to slow down

If you have children, you instinctively understand this. The next time you need to get something done around the house, try doing it two ways. First, have your kids help. That means you need to enlist them. You need to train them. You need to direct them. You need to supervise them. You need to redirect them. You need to recapture and re-enlist them when they wander off. Depending on the ages of your children, it can be pretty exhausting, and even when the work is completed, it may not be to the standard you’d like.

Then try doing the task alone. How much faster can you go? How much better is the quality of the work? How much less aggravation is there to deal with? No wonder many parents start off enlisting their children in tasks to teach and develop them but then throw in the towel after a while and do the work themselves.

Working alone is faster [at least in the beginning], but it doesn’t have the same return. If you want your children to learn, grow, and reach their potential, you need to pay the price and take the time and trouble to lead them through the process-even when it means slowing down or giving up some of your agenda. It’s similar with employees. Leaders aren’t necessarily the first to cross the finish line-people who run alone are the fastest. Leaders are the first  to bring all of their people across the finish line. The payoff to leadership-at work or home-comes on the back end.

2. Express that you care

When you go to your mailbox at home, I bet one of the first things you do is shuffle through the various items. What are you on the look-out for? You’re probably looking for something with a handwritten envelope, because it’s usually a sign that what’s inside is something personal from someone you know. We all desire a personal touch from someone who cares about us.

I read somewhere that the United States Postal Service delivers 170 billion pieces of mail every year. Yet in this vast sea of mail, less than four per cent of the total is comprised of personal letters. That means you have to sort through 100 bills, magazines, bank statements, credit card offers, ads, and other pieces of junk mail to find just four items from someone who knows and actually cares about you.

The people who follow you also desire a personal touch. They want to know that others care about them. Most would be especially pleased to know that their boss had genuine concern about them and valued them as human beings, not just as workers who can get things done for them or the organisation.

We all desire a personal touch from someone who cares about us

3. Create a healthy balance of personal and professional interest

Leaders who show interest in the individuals who work for them need to find the balance between personal and professional interest. Professional interest shows that you have the desire to help them. That is something all good leaders share. Personal interest goes deeper—it shows your heart.

When you take interest in your people as human beings, you need to be sure not to cross the line. There is a point at which interest becomes inappropriate. You mustn’t be nosy. Your desire should be to help, not to invade someone’s privacy or make them feel uncomfortable.

Start by asking fairly neutral questions. You can safely ask how someone’s spouse or children are doing. You can ask about people’s hobbies or other outside interests. Or you can ask a very general question such as, “How is everything else going?” Then pay attention to not only the content of their answer, but also for any kind of emotional reaction. If you sense that there might be something there, then ask a non-threatening follow-up question that asks if everything is okay-but don’t push. If they choose to talk, don’t judge, don’t interrupt, and don’t be too quick to offer advice unless they specifically ask for it.

Why should you take the time to do this? The reality is that when employees’ personal lives are going well, their professional lives often follow suit. What happens at home colours every aspect of people’s lives, including their work. If you have an idea where people are personally, you can know what to expect from them at work, and you may get the opportunity to help them along.

Your desire should be to help, not to invade someone’s privacy or make them feel uncomfortable

4. Pay attention when people start avoiding you

If you make it a habit to walk slowly through the halls, you will get to know your people and the organisation better. You will know when things are working. Your leadership intuition will increase, and when something is wrong, you will pick up on it much more quickly.

Most people are creatures of habit. They fall into patterns and do things the same way most of the time. As you walk around, you will get used to seeing people. Because you will be seen as approachable, people will come out of their offices or cubicles to chat with you. They’ll be visible. If something is wrong with somebody who is normally communicative, that person will suddenly avoid you. So as you walk around, you have to ask yourself, Who am I not seeing?

Often it’s not what people say; it’s what they’re not saying that is a tip-off that something isn’t right. People are always quick to bring good news, but they avoid bringing bad news. I see examples of this all the time in my consulting company, ISS. When we are working with a leader to try to develop a partnership, if that leader intends to sign with us, we hear about it right away. If that leader doesn’t, she takes quite a while to make contact with us. A good 360-Degree Leader always slows down enough to be looking, listening, and reading between the lines.

Often it’s not what people say; it’s what they’re not saying that is a tip-off that something isn’t right

5. Tend to the people, and they will tend to the business

A 360-Degree Leader has many exceptional qualities. But one thing they all have in common is that despite their passion for the vision and their love of action, they give the majority of their effort to the people. Leaders who tend only to business often end up losing the people and the business. But leaders who tend to the people usually build up the people-and the business.

As you strive to walk slowly through the halls, I want to encourage you to find your own unique way of doing it. Look for practices that fit your personality, working situation, and leadership style. One evening in the fall when I was watching Monday Night Football, I saw a wonderful example of a leader who was doing just that. The halftime feature was about NFL coach Dick Vermeil. He was being interviewed in a studio about his team, the Kansas City Chiefs, and how his season was going, but that’s not what intrigued me.

Between interview questions, they were showing Vermeil and his team during a practice. As the players stretched during warm-ups, the veteran coach walked up and down the rows of players, chatting with them. He stopped next to one player, and I could hear him ask, “How’s your wife doing?” And they dialogued for a while.

Leaders who tend only to business often end up losing the people and the business

The interviewer asked Vermeil about his interaction, and he explained that the wife of that player had been fighting lupus. He went on to say that he cares about more than how his players catch the ball or tackle. He interacts with them as people first, then as football players. I’ve since talked to Dick Vermeil, and he told me that he often has players over to his house so that they can get to know each other better.

What’s interesting to me is that when Vermeil came out of retirement to coach the St. Louis Rams in 1997, after a 14-year hiatus, I remember hearing reports that players were skeptical of Vermeil’s methods and thought that he was old-fashioned and out of touch. And he kept telling them to just hang in there with him and see what happened. What happened was the team won the Super Bowl in 1999.

Will Vermeil win another Super Bowl? I don’t know. But I do know this: he has found his own way of walking slowly through the halls that keeps him visible, available, and connected. And because of that, his players respect him and work hard for him because they know he cares about them. A leader can hardly ask for more than that.

Excerpted with permission from The 360° Leader by John C. Maxwell. Published by Jaico Books.

The post Why a Leader Must Walk Slowly Through the Halls appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

When supervisors are wrong

Why do supervisors behave badly with their subordinates? Because most supervisors, managers, foremen/women, department heads, executives and even CEOs of companies do not receive the basic training necessary to successfully supervise others; unfortunately, an MBA degree does not teach you this skill.

Here are some of the things that supervisors do that earn them a bad name:

• Embarrass their staff by disciplining them in front of workmates or clients.
• Label staff’s behaviour [stupid, dumb] or make sarcastic remarks, instead of trying to correct the actual behaviour of the staff member.
• Don’t give recognition for a job well done; concentrate on the 2 per cent of the things their staff do incorrectly, instead of the 98 per cent they do well.
• When dealing with customer complaints, they don’t back up their staff and don’t give employees a chance to tell their side of the story before acting. The manager can always say to the client, “Let me investigate this and I’ll get back to you.”
• Don’t provide an up-to-date job description with key performance indicators and standards of performance for the tasks performed by their staff.
• Don’t provide the necessary training to fill the gap between job requirements and employee’s skills.
• Conduct performance appraisals on staff without a proper job description upon which to base their evaluation; if the employee doesn’t know what’s expected of him/her, and the supervisor doesn’t know either—how can a fair evaluation of the performance be conducted?
• Have one set of company rules for staff, another for themselves. Bend the rules when clients go over the head of front-line staff, causing embarrassment for staff members.
• No set policy and procedure manuals available; rules and regulations of the company are not clearly defined.
• Harass staff [either through bullying or sexual harassment].
• Do nothing to improve the employee’s interest in their jobs. Some are afraid their staff is now ready to compete for their job, so do as little as possible to develop their skills for their next step up. It’s a proven fact that more supervisors are not promoted because there is nobody prepared to take over their existing job.
• Are not available when their staff needs their help; say they have an “open door policy” but are always “too busy” to deal with their staff’s problems.
• Won’t listen to their staff’s suggestions about better ways to complete tasks. The person doing the job normally has the best ideas on how to do the job better, faster, and more efficiently.
• Are perfectionists and expect everything to be done perfectly. Just because they can do the job in 10 minutes [they have 15 years experience] they expect the newcomer to do it in the same amount of time and with the same level of accuracy.
• Nepotism [hiring relatives and close friends].

If this describes the actions of your supervisors/managers, quitting your job is not the only way out. And if it’s you making these mistakes, well, you know what needs to be done.

It’s a proven fact that more supervisors are not promoted because there is nobody prepared to take over their existing job

So what can an employee do?

Complain—that’s what you can do! Learn how to use feedback to let your boss know what his/her behaviour is doing to you. This takes nerve, but most bosses will respect you for having the courage to do so. For example, if your boss has disciplined you publicly, wait until s/he has calmed down and ask for five minutes of his/her time. Say something like, “I have a problem, and I need your help in solving it. Last week, you criticised me three times in front of my co-workers. I felt very humiliated and demoralised. In the future, could I ask you to save those kinds of comments for when we can have some privacy?”

A boss who calls you names

Monica’s supervisor labelled her as stupid and dumb. So she decided to approach her about this privately. She said to her, “I have a problem, and I need your help in solving it. On my performance appraisal, you put down that you didn’t like my attitude, but when I asked for specifics you refused to give them to me. As well, the last few times you’ve corrected my work, you’ve said that I was ‘stupid’ and ‘dumb’. I’m upset that you’ve given me those labels and I don’t know how to improve my performance or what you really want from me.”

Her supervisor was listening to her intently, so Monica went on, “I’d like to go back to the comment from the performance appraisal about my ‘attitude’. What did I do wrong that you objected to?”

Her supervisor replied, “Well, you were rude to the client who walked in yesterday.” [Rude is another label that does not discuss her behaviour.]

“What specifically did I say to that client that was rude?”

“You told her that you had better things to do with your time other than listen to her constant complaints.”

Now Monica has something tangible that she could deal with and change.

Learn how to use feedback to let your boss know what his/her behaviour is doing to you

A boss who is irresponsible

A receptionist’s task was to take and pass on telephone messages to the managers in her office. Mr Bailey had called asking for Mr Smith four times, and the receptionist had placed the messages on his desk throughout the day. She knew that Mr Smith wasn’t very busy that day and had ample time to answer the messages.

The fifth time Mr Bailey called, he accused the receptionist of not passing on his messages. She’d had enough of her boss’s poor business practice and decided to speak to him to see if she could correct the situation. She said to him, “I have a problem, and I need your help in solving it [always a great opening line]. Mr Bailey called in and left messages for you five times today. The last time he phoned, he accused me of not passing his messages on to you. What should I tell him the next time he calls?” This way, she dumped the problem into the lap of the person causing it.

Precautions while handling a difficult boss

Before you decide to say anything to an aggressive supervisor, ask yourself if you might make matters worse by saying something. If this person treats everyone the same belligerent way, it may not be worth the risk of discussing the matter. If you’re working for a truly incorrigible boss, and there’s little likelihood of there being a change in his or her behaviour, you may have to mark time until you can get away from the bully.

Go higher up the chain of command only when the supervisor’s behaviour is affecting the rest of the staff. Only group complaints can oust an ineffective supervisor if done correctly. Make sure the group uses facts to explain their grievances, giving details of what has actually happened—costs in lost revenue, customer relations, delays, unmet deadlines, unnecessary overtime, production stoppages, etc.

If it’s only you the supervisor has trouble with, you might be facing a personality clash. This can happen to two individuals who are on entirely different wavelengths. Consider talking to someone in your human resources department, apply for a transfer to another position in your company or leave for greener pastures. When you feel your boss has removed all the pride and pleasure you get from your work, it’s time to leave.

The post Help! I Have a Boss From Hell appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

Despite the concerns, there is clear evidence that compassion in the workplace makes business sense. It not only improves workplace culture, but can also help your company’s bottom line. Cultivating a compassionate environment serves as a win-win situation for everyone.

Here are three important benefits of compassion at the workplace:

1. Employee retention

One of the many benefits of compassion in the workplace is improved employee retention. After all, would you rather work for a boss who yells at you and threatens that your job might be at stake when you ask to go home early because you aren’t feeling well? Or would you prefer the boss who cheers you on and shows understanding when you have to call in sick because you’ve got the flu? Creating a compassionate workplace is one of the best ways to retain employees over the long haul.

2. Decreased stress

One effective way employees can reduce their stress is by gaining support from co-workers. In a compassionate environment the boss doesn’t hover around the water cooler shouting for everyone to get back to work. Instead, employees are given time to engage in healthy amounts of conversation.

When allowed to linger for a few minutes during breaks and hallways, employees are likely to strike up conversations about what goes on in their lives outside the office. Discussions about family, children and hobbies begin to occur. A 2012 study published in BMC Public Health showed that when employees feel like they’re bonding, their stress levels decrease. And decreased stress means employees are less likely to burn out and more likely to be productive.

3. Improved health

Positive social interactions also lead to physical health benefits, according to a 2008 study published in the Academy of Management Review. A few minutes of mingling with co-workers every day can help lower blood pressure and decrease heart rate. These beneficial physiological changes boost employees’ immune systems, reduce absenteeism and help bring down company’s healthcare costs too. What’s more, employees who are in good health tend to be more productive.

Research also shows that fostering better health has a domino effect that helps the employees’ entire family. When employees feel better, they’re more likely to exhibit behaviour that can have a positive impact on their families—such as cooking healthier meals and taking part in physical activities. When entire families are healthy, employees are less likely to use their sick leave.

Compassion and social support has been linked to faster recovery from illness. Sending flowers to a co-worker after she’s had a baby or providing meals to a manager who has had surgery are just a few simple gestures that can help people feel better faster. Managers who want to foster compassion can create opportunities for employees to help one another —such as allowing workers to donate sick leave to people with long-term illnesses.

Contagious and reciprocal

While many business leaders fear that showing compassion will cause employees to take advantage of their graciousness, research shows the opposite is true. When leaders behave in a compassionate and cooperative manner, employees are more likely to reciprocate.

A 2010 study published in PNAS found that cooperative behaviour cascades in human networks. In a series of studies, participants repeatedly showed a desire to pay-it-forward. Each person who was treated kindly, wanted to extend generosity toward others.

People feel good about themselves when they’re treated with compassion. As a result, they tend to want to extend those positive feelings to others. Office productivity is much more likely to soar when co-workers are cooperating, rather than competing with one another’s efforts.

Creating a culture of compassion

Creating a culture of compassion involves reducing hardships and taking steps to build relationships. Here are a few examples of ways leaders can foster compassion:

• Connect new hires with relationally skilled employees. Ensure that newcomers are allied with people who can answer questions and assist them in getting their needs met.
• Encourage socialisation. Rather than chastise employees for chatting in the hallways or at the coffee vending machine, provide opportunities for them to connect with one another. Allowing time for employees to connect with one another on a human level can increase their workplace satisfaction.
• Incorporate support into the workplace. Rather than telling employees to ‘toughen up’ when they express difficulties doing their work, invite suggestions that could improve the environment.

Small steps, big difference

The good news: any organisation can introduce compassion to the workplace. A few small steps at a time can begin to make a big difference—cheerful greetings, conversations about family members, or simply delivering an employee a much needed cup of coffee can set the tone for a compassionate environment. Showing people you care, and creating policies that foster compassion, are simple but effective ways to improve business.

This was first published in the May 2015 issue of Complete Wellbeing.

The post Wanted urgently: a compassionate boss appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

Published by: Rupa Publications

ISBN: 978-8129136824

Pages: 288

Price: INR 295

Almost the entire literature in the area of leadership and management tends to focus on the performance and the efficiency of managers. Sibichen Mathew is of the opinion that “true learning can take place not by looking at the right traits, but by analysing the wrong ones.”  Thus was born the premise for When the Boss is Wrong, which contains 50 different dimensions of bad leadership and their ramifications for people and organisations.

Sibichen’s aim with this “systematic inquiry” has been to create unique prescriptions for “wrong” bosses, and solutions for their “suffering” subordinates. Using researches and studies exemplify the findings that Sibichen himself gathered over years of experience—through interviewing well-known company heads, questionnaires about bosses and observing behaviours in his own workplace. What results is a study dotted with real life anecdotes and cutting across many kinds of workplaces.

When the boss is wrong is both informative as well as enjoyable at the same time.

In a chapter, “Mr Boss, you are petty!”, Sibichen lists out revealing responses of middle-level managers who were asked why their boss is petty. The answers ring a bell and make you want to try the prescriptions, instantly!

“Coping with a young boss” and “Coping with an old boss”—two chapters that emphasise on how a tectonic shift in working style [between generations] may wreck the boats of senior employees’ or bust the myth that seniority assures wisdom.

Perhaps, the most humorous idea in the book is the one that shows how stages similar to the “ashrams” can be seen in the professional lives of many people, often detrimental to the organisation. After all, how much good can a boss, who is in a state of nirvana after losing his young “fizz” over two decades, do? “Which animal are you and your boss?” will make you smile, before making you feel not-so-flattered.

While most of the book throws at you unique ideas and experiences of working professionals, some [though not any less significant] may not be unheard of. Sibichen begins with how you could have absorbed some of the personality traits of your boss and goes on to talk about “Runaway Bosses” and “Snoopervisors”, those low on EQ or high on “ditching ethics”. You will be encouraged to do a thorough self-examination!

The lessons at the end of each chapter are prescriptions for the bosses, precautions for the employees and precepts for the organisation. Some deserve heeding, like–to remember that “you leave a trail of whatever you do in the organisation”, “images that are bought, never match images which are gained through excellence” and “the courage and preparedness to unlearn is a necessary prerequisite for creativity”.

Mostly, the lessons are simplistic and commonsensical. The ones that contain interviews of top bosses of well-known organisations, tests to take [like the one that checks how much your present boss knows you] or boxes with questions to ponder upon are interesting.

When the Boss is Wrong is a long book. Some chapters overlap. Some ideas may confuse too. For instance, Narcissism and Authoritarianism are otherwise seen as negative traits but are “excused” in a chapter which discusses essential traits of “Messiah Bosses”. The “signs of recovery” of an organisation after suffering at the hands of any kind of a bad boss are the same across all chapters.

Underlying the narrative of the book appears a picture of a good boss—who telephones all the employees when a bomb blast occurs in a city, or who credits the team before his own managerial skills. And overarching this exercise is a question for all bosses—how many of you really care about what others think of you? While the bosses think it over, all you can do is “make your bosses smile with your smile”, especially if, in your organisation, “no good work goes unpunished”.

This was first published in the October 2015 issue of Complete Wellbeing.

The post When the Boss is Wrong By Sibichen K Mathew appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

Myth 1 Leaders should encourage competition amongst their team members

Some leaders make people compete so they perform better by trying to outdo their teammates. This makes as much sense as telling the defender in a football team to compete with the striker rather than to work together to score goals.

Although competition is seen to influence people to go the extra mile and perform better, encouraging collaboration and using peoples’ collective strengths is a more productive approach. When people are inspired to make the team bigger than themselves, it leads to better teamwork and results.

Myth 2 Leaders should have full control and command over their followers

By having complete control over the team and issuing commands, some leaders get the sense that they have a better grip on the situation and can do things ‘their way’. In truth—and extensive research supports this—dictatorial leadership stifles innovation and people actually perform better when they are trusted to perform well.

Myth 3 Leaders should take an ‘ivory tower’ approach

Leaders who stay at head office and keep an elitist approach may think that they are gaining more respect from their employees. The reality is that in order to inspire people, you need to connect with them, which can happen more easily with face-to-face time. Additionally, leaders who are more involved have a better idea of the realities of the team’s working situation and find solutions to some of the daily obstacles.

Myth 4 Leaders should be charismatic

It is true that some leaders have sheer charisma. However, many leaders earn respect through their attitude, diligence, and capabilities. As my friend, Dr. Nido Qubein says, “it is authenticity, not charisma that counts.” Successful leaders are authentic.

Myth 5 True leaders are born leaders

Yes, some leaders are innately gifted with leadership qualities; however, most of them become leaders by experience, learning from mentors and having a burning desire to lead. Whether acquired or innate, leaders need to consciously hone their abilities to lead. And yes, leadership improves with experience.

Myth 6 Leaders are people who have been designated to a position of leadership

Leaders do not need a designated position to lead. They only need the right attitude and desire to lead. An organisation needs leaders at all levels.

Myth 7 Leaders need to know it all

The best leaders hire people who are smarter and skilled in other ways than themselves so that they can learn from them and work together to achieve the common goal. Great leaders realise that they do not know it all, and that in order for the team to perform at its peak, each member needs to contribute his or her own expertise. Leaders are aware that mistakes happen. However, they also understand that they must learn from these mistakes and take measures to prevent them in the future. Leaders know how to bounce back bigger and stronger after their mistakes.

Myth 8 Leaders should be older and more mature than the team they are leading

In some cases, age does bring the experience that is required to lead. However, it is not a prerequisite. There are many examples of young, capable, and energetic leaders that have provided fresh, new thinking to an organisation.

Myth 9 Leaders are egotistical and self-centered

Leaders require a sense of humility in order to understand that everything happens with the help of others. They need to appreciate that they are not the only drivers of success and that they require the rest of their team to reach their goals.

Myth 10 Leaders do not delegate high-level work

Great leaders create leaders, not followers. And they do so by being good role models and allowing their team to prove its ability by assigning important work. [Here’s how you can become a master delegator]

Effective leadership

Many prevalent leaders in society today have been influenced by these myths, whether it is because of the public media, what they have been taught in school, or a leader that they have worked with in the past. These myths can explain the lack of purpose that members of many organisations feel.

Counter to commonly-believed myths, effective leadership is…

• being a role model
• being a coach
• empowering others
• trusting and believing in the inherent abilities and gifts of team members
• encouraging collaboration instead of competition
• involving the team in the preparation of a clear vision and mission
• sincere praise of team members at every opportunity
• showing empathy and care
• rewarding excellence
• being result-oriented, not task-oriented
• exhibiting clear, ongoing, and positive communication

Effective leadership is the ability to inspire and catalyse the potential of the team. It is all about people. You share your success with them, tap into their talents, and show them how their work makes a difference. This way their work becomes far more than just making a livelihood. You arouse their curiosity to learn more, stretch their imagination by encouraging them to aim high and to make decisions.

Leadership is about making leaders of your followers. People learn best when they have to teach others, so it is about unleashing the spirit of empowerment and involvement. There is so much richness within each person to be discovered. Until it is discovered, it will forever be absent from the workplace. It is the role of effective leaders to nurture this richness.

You can avoid falling into the trap of these myths by being an effective leader. If you have a leader who operates from these myths, do not react to him or her but rather become the leader that he or she ends up looking up to.

The post What a leader is not appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.

Know thy boss

Try and understand what makes the top man/woman tick. Realising his/her vision for the company will help define your own goals and immediate targets. Always ensure that your relationship is very professional and cordial, but don’t be afraid to add that personal touch. Remember birthdays and important anniversaries with a card, or bouquet, and arrange for all your colleagues to sign it as well, so that you are not accused of the old fashioned apple-polishing!

Communicate with tact

Communication with one’s boss is truly an art that requires a great degree of discretion and diplomacy. You’ll have to exercise your judgement in order to determine when it would be necessary to express a contradictory opinion in the best interests of the company, and when you would need to follow instructions blindly without question. Don’t allow yourself to be intimidated in such a situation. If you have a grievance that needs to be redressed, avoid whining accusations. Stick to presenting bare facts without embellishment.

Be a team player

In today’s cut-throat corporate scenario, it is important to be a team player and pull your own weight. Bury the hatchet over any kind of rivalry with colleagues and keep the personal equation out of the work arena. Your professionalism will always be a valuable asset to any employer.

Never feel that you’re indispensable

While you may certainly be an important part of the company, never create a situation in your mind in which you over-rate your own importance. This attitude can skewer workplace relationships and bring you to the brink of professional disaster!

Don’t toot your own horn

No matter how tempted you may be to hint to your boss about how perfect you are for that upcoming promotion, or a big project at hand, let your actions speak louder than your words. Allowing him/her to make their own independent decisions about you will certainly give you more credibility.

And, remember—as an employee, it’s not what you know, but what you do with what you know that makes all the difference!

When you’re the boss

As the head of your company, you may constantly endeavour to strike the right note with your employees. The challenges and dilemmas that you face in this situation are manifold. You can’t afford to be too familiar, or you’ll find that your authority may be undermined at the first instance. All too-frequent requests for promotion and leave of absence will invariably reach your door. However, in today’s era of egalitarian relationships at the workplace, a boss who has an air of superiority can be terribly unpopular. Don’t despair; it doesn’t have to be lonely at the top!

Be human, but not too accessible

In order to get the best out of your employees, you’ll find that you’ll need to strike a fine balance between familiarity and authority. According to career counsellor Sabitha Kishore: “You need to ensure loyalty and still maintain healthy discipline, be warm and considerate, but constantly aware of that invisible line that you can’t cross.” For instance, you should enquire about the health of a sick employee and have a basic understanding of his/her social and economic situation, but you can’t invite him/her out for dinner. This basic protocol stems from the fact that an employer can’t afford to be too personal, but, at the same time, the human element should be apparent in the dynamics of all your relationships. By genuinely caring about the wellbeing of your employees, without relinquishing a formal working relationship, you can easily manage to strike the right note.

Explore the psyche of your employee

Understanding the background and frame of mind of the people you’ll be hiring is a good idea. This can give you valuable insights into their psyche. “You’ll have to be aware of what they’re looking for after they’ve accepted a position in your company,” says Emma Watson, a clinical psychologist. “For instance, is your employee a family man, searching for a stable career and the security that it can give his life, or is s/he the kind who loves the adrenaline rush of a high-powered job and is constantly seeking new challenges?” Fitting the personality of the candidate to the right job profile will ensure a smooth working relationship for all concerned. As an employer, your biggest asset would be excellent judgement. Being aware of the strengths and shortcomings of your employees will also allow you to reap the benefits of their talents.

Define responsibilities

Ensure that your team has clearly defined goals and that everyone knows what their core responsibilities are. If these boundaries are well-established at the outset, there can be no room for conflict later. Delegate tasks with care and allow your team to function independently when you do. It may be difficult for you to adopt this approach, but if you interfere too often into delegated responsibilities, your office will never function as an independent unit. It is also not particularly healthy for employees to use you as an emergency crutch.

The post The Boss-Employee Relationship appeared first on Complete Wellbeing.