Comments on: Can One Woman Love Two Men? https://completewellbeing.com/article/loving-two-why-women-fall-for-the-other-man/ Award-winning content for the wellbeing of your body, mind and spirit Mon, 22 May 2023 13:10:17 +0000 hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=7.0 By: Anon. https://completewellbeing.com/article/loving-two-why-women-fall-for-the-other-man/#comment-2452 Wed, 25 Apr 2018 12:41:10 +0000 http://completewellbeing.com/wp4/?p=968#comment-2452 I was in love with a guy, 5 years ago, I believe we both were. but he was already in a relationship with a friend of mine, I would say at the time he was immature and jumped from one relationship to another. He told me he loved me, but knowing the kind of person he was, at the time I didn’t believe it. with time I grew to believe him, but again he couldn’t settle for me because of how different we were. I have always been labelled the “good girl” and he, the “bad boy” and so to him the combination was not doable. We drifted apart for a while (almost 2 years). I fell in love with another guy, and for 3 years (through ups and downs) we managed to stay together. After 3 and a half years with my boyfriend, I met the guy I had been in love with years back. I realized I had been angry at him because he never made me his first choice. We talked about it and I realized I was still in love with him, that nothing had changed, in fact, the love had enhanced, considering both of us are now mature, yes, he has matured and is now a real man committed to one woman. the issue is, both of us are in relationships. The guy I am with is so kind and so is the woman he is with, and because of that, we cant hurt the people we love to fulfil our selfish desires. But the thing is, we make each other happy, and when we are apart, the feeling is painful. I love my boyfriend, but I also love the other guy. what should I do??

]]> By: Anonymous https://completewellbeing.com/article/loving-two-why-women-fall-for-the-other-man/#comment-1368 Fri, 15 Aug 2014 19:15:34 +0000 http://completewellbeing.com/wp4/?p=968#comment-1368 Love love love love love

]]> By: galina https://completewellbeing.com/article/loving-two-why-women-fall-for-the-other-man/#comment-1367 Tue, 05 Nov 2013 20:53:51 +0000 http://completewellbeing.com/wp4/?p=968#comment-1367 I love two men, and I dont think I am I-centric because of it. I give them both fulfillment, I am their friend and companion and I am there for them when they need me. But I have a busy life and dont want a man living with me, or interfering in my home life with my two daughters. One of the men has a very busy work schedule and spends a lot of time travelling so our arangement suits him. The other also has a small son, so he is happy to have time for him too. We are all happy, so where is the problem?

]]> By: Alaina https://completewellbeing.com/article/loving-two-why-women-fall-for-the-other-man/#comment-1364 Tue, 30 Nov -0001 00:00:00 +0000 http://completewellbeing.com/wp4/?p=968#comment-1364 This article is based on a particular type of love– devotional love. Not every relationship is based on being “sincerely dedicated to the satisfaction of another” and postponing “personal gratification to meet the needs of another.” A wife does not need to give up key aspects of herself, her needs and her goals to be with her “life partner.” The very definition of a partner is challenged in this article– a partnership is a cooperative between people who agree to share responsibility for achieving some specific goals in life. Being a good partner does not mean putting yourself last in your household equation– it simply means being on the same page with your significant other. I think this article is rather biased from the culture it comes from and the opinions it is expressing are not worldwide views of marriage.

]]> By: Jim Lloyd https://completewellbeing.com/article/loving-two-why-women-fall-for-the-other-man/#comment-1365 Tue, 30 Nov -0001 00:00:00 +0000 http://completewellbeing.com/wp4/?p=968#comment-1365 My wife has a long-time male friend who no longer lives with his wife and instead lives in his 56ft. boat which is attached to our dock. This situation has prevailed for over a year. My wife want me to accept her friend as part of our family and I refuse. She feels guilty when he is asked to go home early or stay away for a few days. He and she are 64 and I am 72. Both have admitted affection for one another. Should I bend and include him in every event of hers and my life?

]]> By: Dr Minnu Bhonsle https://completewellbeing.com/article/loving-two-why-women-fall-for-the-other-man/#comment-1366 Tue, 30 Nov -0001 00:00:00 +0000 http://completewellbeing.com/wp4/?p=968#comment-1366 Dear Jim,

You are obviously uncomfortable with the ‘family’ arrangement your wife wants vis-à-vis her male friend. Your discomfort is valid, given the fact that they have declared their affection for each other (if this affection erodes the sanctity of your couplehood with her). It is fair on your part to protect this sanctity and not want him to be a part of the life you share with your wife. What is not clear however, is the dynamics between you and your wife throughout your married life, other than this difference of opinion regarding the inclusion of her male friend in your family since a year. At this stage of your life, after being together for so many years, when the relationship should have crystallized into a harmonious and mutually respectful companionship, the opposite seems to have happened. It would be a worthwhile exercise to seek couple’s counselling, so that both of you can be sensitized to the valid needs of each other. Counselling could also help reveal the real nature of her friendship with him, the reason for her insistence and guilt, and also help address any other outstanding relationship issues between the two of you.

Dr Minnu Bhonsle, psychotherapist & counsellor

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